Plot Twist. in Since OD is shutting down....

Okay so he’d been blowing up my phone from 2 different numbers since I think Friday night but I had both of them blocked but happened to see them in a different spot in my messages. I finally responded and told him I didn’t trust him and because he was bothering me I was going to report him. Well, as it turns out his girlfriend messaged me. As I was decided to message back or not, my daughter walked into my room and was complaining about how bored she was and blah blah blah so I was like okay I’m going to message her back and see how the conversation goes.

I expressed my concerns for him badmouthing in front of our child and she told me she wouldn’t allow it and begged me to let them take her and they’d bring on Thursday. I said absolutely what time and she said about 3 hours. I got my daughter ready and packed her things. She was totally excited. I allowed it simply because his girlfriend talked to me with respect, the respect I don’t get from him. I didn’t do it because he threatened court again

So she left Saturday afternoon about 5:30. I’ve been in pretty good contact with the girlfriend but I haven’t heard from them today. I’ll probably text later if I don’t get a text. I know that she’s having a good time and things are going alright. The girlfriend definitely understand that he’s not really much of a parent or an adult and has even mentioned she feels like she’s his Mom. I’m so glad that she sees everything the same way I do and we have a lot of common ground in this. He said something about how they filed the paperwork while they were here the other day so I’d really like to know if that happened or not but I won’t ask because I’m not going to give him the luxury of knowing I’m worried about it. I really don’t care either way.

I’ve been cleaning and got some groceries yesterday. I called my Mom on Saturday after my daughter left and told her that she went with her Dad and would be gone until Thursday and I heard my Dad say something. I couldn’t tell what he said but I could tell by the tone it was something rude and nasty. Why would you fucking care if she goes with her Dad? Again, I just feel that he definitely has his own motives for wanting him out of the picture because he’s had really questionable behavior around my daughter and probably wants one less person to be aware of it.

I’m not the guy’s biggest fan either. He’s put me and my daughter through an absolute ringer since I told him I was pregnant but my daughter is almost 6 and it’s bullshit that people would rather her sit around bored missing out on fun stuff with him and me battle with mental health issues being a single Mom than be more open minded and understand that it’s better for her to see the truth! It’s a lot different than someone just saying this is how someone is when you actually get to experience it for yourself.

My Dad is a constant concern for me. I envy people that only have to worry about someone once or twice a year at a family function but for me I have to be aware of him all the time because I never get to see my Mom unless I see him as well. I also get annoyed that she can’t even stop by without him coming inside with her. He’s been told to his face that I don’t want him around my daughter. He also knows that she’s around adults every single day and still tries to push that line. I remember a couple of months ago when he was trying to tell her a secret and her saying, “we don’t tell secrets Grampa” and it’s like wow you just have to constantly keep pushing that line, even when a 5 year old is telling you that your behavior is inappropriate! I wonder if I ever thought about that later and realized okay it’s time to really start watching myself!

It’s like no matter how much of this shit I’ve shut down such as her sitting on his lap, him taking her in the house to brush her hair, him whispering to her, telling her secrets, it’s like he’s always going to find a way to try and groom her and that’s why I keep the contact with him at the bare ass minimum. I just refuse to keep my daughter from her Dad simply because that’s what he wants me to do to help conceal his weird behavior and I’ll be damned if I’m going to do that. The guy has threatened me with court for over a month now and I have got to be as reasonable about him seeing as daughter as possible because I don’t want to look back and have anyone to blame for helping me decide to keep her away.

I’m not saying that it’s alright for her Dad to treat me the way he does but by keeping her from him that’s saying that my feelings are above hers. I’m just hoping with time he will talk to me with respect and stop badmouthing me in front of her. I also don’t even have to talk to him anymore, I talk to his girlfriend so I’d be cool with not needing a court order but if he’s filed than that’s the route we are going to be looking at. I really like that I can communicate with her and she seems really down the Earth, kind, respectful and I definitely have more trust in her to be around my kid than I do him!

I just don’t want to look back with a lot of regret and know that I robbed my daughter of time with her Dad because of my own hurt feelings. I hate the way this guy fucking treats me and there’s nothing okay about it but there’s nothing okay with me keeping my kid from him either. It’s not about me and it’s not about him. It’s about my daughter having both of us. This situation is never going to be perfect and that’s okay but I think it’s great that he wants to take her and I’m going to be as supportive as I can be.