When All You Can Do Is Pray in Meeting Mr. Jesus Christ

My friend Judi moved from the hospital into a rehabilitation center today. I'm happy for her because she is in one of the most top-drawer places I've ever seen. She likes the food and I think she is going to grow accustomed to not being alone all the time.

Health wise I was sad to see her, though her stroke has not left her in serious condition, her speech and ability to manipulate her left leg have been affected. I see other issues but she denies them to the doctor. She's depressed, rightly so. For eleven days she has been alone in the hospital. She had the stroke at home, alone and was very frightened.

Today she turned 73 years old. I cannot imagine her life having lived with her parents or briefly a husband for all but 10 months of her life. This isn't going well for her and I have been praying for her to adjust as well as possible. I see since she moved out of my neighborhood and I haven't been able to get to her house she has really gone downhill. She has lost over 40 pounds, she looks empty, and her humor is all but gone. None of that is from the stroke, especially the humor because for a moment tonight I had her giggling like the little child she is.

She's in God's hands. He knows what is best for her. I'll try to talk with her on the phone often, and when I get my car fixed I'll be able to go have a meal or visit with her a few times a month, more if something comes up for me financially. How pathetic that money is keeping me from someone I care so much about.

I continue prayer for healing, for the unspoken, Judi's pacemaker site, my illness and foot, an unspoken broken heart, a friend with RA, and for a friendship that is taking leave. Additionally I pray for a friendship that is growing, my new church and my growth in my relationship with Christ.

I also pray for my son who texted me tonight wanting to know how to convince his woman that government takeover of the people is inevitable and they need to prepare now. She wants to believe America is basically a good place. I pray for her to keep that childlike heart but to also quickly come to terms with reality. I love her very much and would like to see her under my son's care.

I have much on my mind tonight but want to keep it in there and marinate in it all for a while.

Winter is near. I can not begin to express how deeply I wish I were far, far, far south of here. Except for my son and Dad I have no reason to be here. Nor anywhere really. I just want to be in the hot, steamy isolated regions of quiet.

I need provisions for bug out. Sure would be nice to not need them but irrational to not have them. To think a decade ago I was set for three years off grid living, and had been for many years prior to that. Now I own a pocket knife, warm dry boots and a jacket. I've got to change my ways. Being in Christ is my comfort. Amen!