april 27, 2012 in The Wonderland Years: 2012: 1/2 done

'i'm not. you know.

As mentioned, I'm having a really hard time accepting this. I'm in shock I guess. And quite obviously very upset. This isn't me I'm not. partially schizophrenic. No I'm a fairly well-adjusted woman.

But see that's the thing though. is I'm not. I have PTSD - which, btw, has gotten worse - of course I'm not well-adjusted! my adjustments are all.skewed.

yeah and so's my head.

there's someone in my head but it isn't me - pink floyd. yes that's it. that is exactly it. thank you pink floyd. that's the most clear concise way to explain it. As to who it is I...........I really don't know.

i don't even know who i am anymore. i'm so.lost. trapped.

or maybe it is me but it doesn't feel like me at all. fuk!

i didn't ask for this.