sept. 20, 2012 in The Wonderland Years: 2012: 1/2 done

'>I was thinking about this yesterday morning while out. As put. Ok here's what I'm not talking about. as of late.

The depression. The PTSD. The schizophrenia. The alcoholism. The anorexia. The cutting [actually I haven't cut in awhile, so. not like i'm goin for a record here or anything as i'm not].

Um.......the PTSD. You know, it goes along w/ the schizophrenia. I, er. 'visit the circus' as it were and the 2 combine. It's not that I like it when it happens as I don't. i've just grown used to it. I've not had any dreams about r*pe lately.

Ok as for the alcoholism. um. still there. Last week I didn't have a drink at the bar and I didn't last night either. Still goin w/ the whole 6 wk off 6 wk on 6 wk off plan for that. Like, I still don't think I'm er, 'strong' enough to make it w/o at least drinking somewheres. just not at a bar. or really my place. Up in Arvada we either drink or smoke, so. But I don't like it when I set this plan out to do the 6 wk thing and then I go to a bar and unexpectedly drink therefore interrupting it. The withdrawl hasn't really hit me. well.........i mean maybe it has cause i'm actually starting to miss drinking.

The anorexia. well I eat when I'm hungry. basically.