THE SPECIAL SUNDAY: OUT OF THE BLUE in THE REALITY SOAP: AFTER DAD'S FUNERAL

Last Sunday, I was "off my fasting duty" for the rest of this week. I'd met some people I'd been missing. I'd also ended up spending that whole day with the people I'd wanted to see, so it was such a blessing. It was completely out of the blue.

I didn't come home on the weekend, again. There was another gathering at Aunt Ria's in Warung Buncit nearby, so I thought it was better not to. The whole family was there too anyway.

I finished the new revision of my novel synopsis (at last, thank God!) before sending it to Niko on Saturday night. (I hope he finds it okay, at least, so I can start writing my novel (right away!)

Since I'm "off my fasting duty" for a week, I decided to try "The Wing-Stop: The Wings Expert" at Setiabudi One for lunch. I ordered boneless strips with barbeque sauce and cheese fries with jalapeno, plus mint green tea. So delicious!

I was finishing my lunch by the window of the restaurant when Tony B. and Vince passed by outside. They were genuinely surprised to see me eating on a broad daylight instead of fasting!

I was a bit surprised to see them too. I mean, it was completely out of the blue. Tony B. and Vince came in and wondered why I wasn't fasting. (Duh, boys. I often have to repeat explaining 'this' - even when they've already heard this before.)

"Mark is on his way here," they both told me. "He's still at Daily Food Hall."

"Oh, cool." I smiled, but my heart was pounding violently inside. It had been months since I attended his wedding. How was he doing? We only communicate through FB and WA. Nothing much. He and his wife Tiara are alright.

Calm down.

When Mark finally came into the restaurant - with that familiar dazzling smile on his sweet face, I automatically got up and came up to him. We hugged each other tightly, longer than I could really endure emotionally. God, I've missed him so much, I'd thought sadly. God, please forgive me for still feeling this way about him. I get along well with her too, so that's why this makes me feel even worse now.

Please, make these sad feelings go away. I don't want this unrequited love anymore. I want to move on. Please, help me let him go. I have to; this is killing me! I need to be a more decent friend to both of them. God, please. I want to; I have to. Please, help me...

"How are you?"

"I'm alright, dude." We exchanged smiles and other pleasantries. I suddenly felt glad that Tony B. and Vince were around. "You? Where's your wife?"

"She's on her way here." Good. Thank God. That would help me to stick to reality all through the day.

The four of us went to Anomali Cafe after that. (My favourite spot every Wednesday night with the writers' club!) Over coffee, we sat down and chatted again. Guys mostly talked about football, but I didn't mind.

They did appreciate me, though, which had made me feel warm with joy. They said they'd noticed how I'd gone through drastic changes, from the day Dad died to my decision to change my career and move out of my family's home. Socially, I've also become more open, according to them.

After a while, the guys suddenly got hungry. (I was still full.) So the four of us went to our favourite small diner of Chinese foods near Perbanas University - Matahari. They ordered foods and drinks while I only had tea.

Then more was talked about. Poor Tony B. had already broken up with his last girlfriend Risna. "She dumped me," he'd simply said. He even gave a casual shrug about it, but - somehow - I knew better.

So that's why he's considering moving to Bali. Another heartbreak.

We all tried to cheer him up, though. Vince said,"No worries, mate. You're going to meet a nice Balinese woman there, who will fall for your charm."

"Your white hair," Mark joked, and I nudged him before smiling at Tony B. and offered a compliment:"Your wisdom."

That had made him smile. Thank God. I just want him to be happy. I care about Tony B.

Then Mark's wife Tiara phoned. She said she was close to Setiabudi One. So the guys finished off their lunch (and I my tea), and then we paid.

After that, the four of us walked back to Setiabudi One, talking and laughing all the way. The sun was shining, but - thankfully - there wasn't too much heat. In fact, there was this gentle breeze blowing at us. Hmm, very nice. At least Mark didn't have to suffer so much. (His skin is allergic to heat.)

We stopped by right in front of Daily Food Hall, while Tony B. was heading to Guardian for some toiletries. Vince, Mark, and I stood together for a while - talking and joking around. Mark and I pretended to fight like little kids, pushing each other as hard as possible. Vince looked at both of us and laughed.

"It would be funny if you two suddenly fell," he joked. But then Tiara called Mark again and we had to stop. She was at The Platters now.

We went there after Tony B. caught up with us again. Honestly, I was glad to see her too. Tiara is a nice girl. I get along with her just fine; no hidden agenda, no stupid drama or jealousy whatsoever.

We sat down there and ordered drinks while Tiara was eating her pasta. This time, the guys ordered beers while I only had mineral water. Then more talking. Feast, feast, feast.

After that, we went straight to Tiara's car and got in. Tiara was driving us to Taman Sari Apartment, Semanggi, where Tony B. and Vince live.

The guys shopped for drinks. Mark asked us ladies what we'd like, and I said mineral water. Tiara didn't want anything, but he got her some tea anyway.

It was really a special Sunny Sunday to me. We talked as the sun went down, the guys drinking more beers while I had my mineral water...again. There was this random moment when Vince suddenly asked me what type of guy that I really like. I didn't expect that, so that had caught me off guard for a moment. Especially when all attention was suddenly on me! (Mind you, I'm not that used to it.) It was also a bit nerve-racking that Mark seemed genuinely curious too. I wasn't really sure why. Maybe it was because we'd sort of talked about this thing before, sometime last year.

No, I'm not angry. I know Vince only meant well. (He always does; he's got a really good heart. Vinny is so luck to have a sweet husband like him!) I know they all care about me. They're not concerned with me because I'm 32 and still single.

They're concerned with me because I'm still romantically-challenged.

Then, as usual, Vince started giving me 'suggestions'. Why not with someone I've already known? D. isn't with Janey anymore.

"No, no, no." I laughed while shaking my head. "D's alright, but he's already like a baby brother to me."

"How about Kenneth?" What? Ken?? "He may be a bit weird, but who knows? He might make a good husband."

I just smiled and shrugged, not knowing what to say.

"Okay, okay." Vince thought hard for a second before saying:"Tony?"

"I'm already like a father to her," Tony B. quickly - and calmly - interrupted. He smiled and winked at me. I smiled shyly back at him, but at that time sensed something else:

Did I just hear a trace of disappointment in his voice - or was I just imagining it? I mean, we've grown much closer lately, especially after Dad had died last January.

I didn't have time to think, though, because Vince went on with more names.

"How about the other new teachers? Stephen? Or, who's that other guy..."

"Justin," Tony B. put in helpfully. "He and Indri have been flirting with each other that it's so obvious."

"Okay." Running out of names, Vince turned to me. "Does he have to be Indonesian?"

"No."

"Does he have to be in the same religion as yours?"

"Uh..." Their eyes were on me now, even Mark's and Tiara's. Gulp. Ugh. Oops. "Err...yeah."

I hoped I hadn't offended them with that. As weird as this may sound to you, I consider marriage as part of a religious duty as well.

Vince was thinking again before finally saying:

"You still have many options here."

Yeah, I know that, Vince, I wanted to tell him. I don't know why I'm so unenthusiastic.

"Maybe when it's the right time," Vince again, as if reading my mind. His blue eyes radiated genuine concern that I felt a huge lump forming in my throat - and my eyelids felt heavy, weighted by something familiarly warm, threatening to fall.

Anyway, all in all, it was a perfect Sunny Sunday. Tony B. expressed his gratitude for having run into me at random.

"Like it's meant to be," he said with a smile at me. I smiled back and nodded in agreement.

"I'm glad I've finally got to meet the people I wanted to meet today." And I'd realised that I really meant it.

I guess that was it; the closure. I've finally set Mark free. I've moved on. He's happy with Tiara and I'm glad. I should be happy for him too.

Will I remain Ms.Independent, a lone she-warrior?

That night, Mark and Tiara dropped me off at Aunt Ria's in Warung Buncit. They were going to Tiara's family in Depok.

R.