Nerves in Current Events

I suppose that my nerves are getting to me. Somewhere under the surface, I am anxious about getting the call about that full-time position I applied for. TMI but it’s been a shitty day. Literally. Do I even need to do a coffee enema tomorrow? I have kept my phone close just in case I get the call. I doubt I will get word on the status of my candidacy this week but that sure would be nice. I’m trying to manifest it at least.

I did not accomplish a lot yesterday. I needed a heavy rest day, I suppose. I felt guilty about it so I ended up going for a run before it snowed. I exercised a bit and then I cooked dinner. Then I went to bed very early. I don’t know what to do or think while I wait, apparently. Today is not a whole lot different. My mind is at least able to focus on other things.

I’ve been watching podcasts and such regarding the esoteric sciences. The occult if you will. Occult just means hidden. I am not practicing occultism, those who can’t see the truth which is right in front of them are the ones who are practicing occultism. They are bringing evil into this world. The knowledge of good and evil is forbidden because it fractures our reality. Those are two concepts with two ends that can never meet. The world is whole and holy, good and evil do not exist here in the way that we think. Anyway, whatever.

What I am going to do is draft that e-mail for the district HR regarding my current position. I will not send that until I get the word about the position I applied for. I don’t want to compromise my candidacy even though it likely wouldn’t. I am going to feel so good after I draft it though.

My roommate is sick again. I never get sick she said to me when we moved in together. I lost count. It’s almost every second month. I suppose I should have seen it coming since she smelt so bad. That is a huge sign that you need to detox.

Speaking of health. One of my reels on FB just broke 25k views. It’s just a Barbara O’Neil clip of her explaining some naturopathy. She’s got a life ban from social media because that’s how freedom of speech and expression works. We are not allowed to learn the truth about what causes disease. Anyway, the comment section of this one is menacing. It’s a lot of old white men who are fat medical health experts calling it pseudoscience. Saying out-of-touch things about “trusted sources” and “anti-science.” Discernment doesn’t work that way. That generation is fucked up beyond repair. Not understanding something doesn’t make it stupid it makes you stupid. Recognize a knowledge gap and just go fill it. The internet happened and we can inform ourselves now. They failed to modernize. They act so entitled too like I am to produce the science for them as though I am the news. They think they’re fighting misinformation and it’s so cringy to witness let alone interact with because they are so out of touch with how things work now in 2023.

Anyway, by 3 pm I know that I won’t have to wait for that call because that is when our department is done by. I hope I get a call tomorrow even if it ruins my day so that I know the score.