Just the tip! in Boredoms

Another "someone at work pissed me off" entry! This one guy at one of my stores likes to ask me way too much personal stuff. Today, he started out asking me about my weekend (pretty usual) and I told him I went to the lake with my friend and got sunburned. Somewhere in there I made the mistake of mentioning that my friend was female so now he started in with crap like: "Oooh, you took a girl to the lake, eh?" and "Did you get lucky?" and I had to bite back some frustration. First of all, I did not take her to the lake, she took me. She drove. I bought lunch to compensate her. Secondly, EVERYTHING I DO IS NOT FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF GETTING LAID! Not that I said it like that. I should have. Maybe he would have shut the fuck up at that point.

Instead, I just told him, with a hefty sigh, that I did not get lucky. Of course then he just laid into me with questions about why, and I just said that she already has a boyfriend (I stopped myself from saying boyfriends because I know he would have latched right the fuck on to that and he would have likely said some douchey, ignorant shit about it and I would have punched him and lost my job...so...) and that put him off that for all of a second when he started asking if I had any other "honeys". I made the big mistake at this point, I should have found some way of pouring some cold water on this conversation but after I told him no (in regards to the "honeys") I mentioned that there was only one girl any time recently who was interested in me. My second mistake was adding how I didn't have any romantic interest in her.

"So what?! Just let her play with your junk and at least get something out of it!" Of course! Why not just use someone I consider a good friend for simple fucking sexual release? Friends come and go but orgasms are forever! AGH! I just walked away at that point. I was super fucking angry with that remark and I walked to the other side of the store just to put as much distance between that sleazy lump of testosterone. I wish I could just say I was gay...douchey dudebros like that would turn and run the other way and never try to interact with me again. Maybe I should say I am...what's the difference? I can't say I'm asexual or anything because that's too much concept for him. A guy who doesn't want to vigorously hump everything?! What?

I get that feeling this way makes me something of an oddity, I do. I don't live for the next set of boobs I get to see. I don't fantasize about sex. I'm not lying about that, either, as most guys are inclined to accuse me of. I don't like sex. I'm AWFUL at it. When I'm terrible at things I stop doing it (see my failed creative writing blog). I can't just grab me some cheap sex for my own gratification and leave my partner unsatisfied, that makes me feel like shit. At the same time, I can't satisfy anybody. Really, what other choice do I have? Sex is something I can easily live without, I never feel any need for it. I don't know if this is because I don't have strong hormonal production or what but it works for me.

Alright, steering away from all that, I might audition for a show in a local theater tomorrow. We'll see if I can even muster the nerve to do it, though I'm sure I won't get any parts even if I do but it might be fun just to do it for old times sake.