Yarps in Current Events

I had one of the worst drives of my life. I was late to work and when I got there everybody was so relieved because they were worried sick about me. April blizzards = May flowers apparently. We had a blizzard overnight and the roads were not cleared yet, but we are pros at driving in shitty weather here in the north. You know the roads are bad when the pickup trucks are even taking it slow. Those that weren’t kept losing control and almost landed themselves in the ditch. This is what almost happened to me when I was coming down a bridge because a pickup truck decided it needed to pass through everybody. If I didn’t need the hours so badly I would have called in. Shelly is the only other person with a longer commute and she didn’t even chance it. Nothing stops her from coming to work.

I left work feeling pretty good. There were a lot of problems and I was the one everybody called to get help. I like those days. Also, I found an area rug on clearance that was marked down 75% and I was pretty pumped about it.

When I got home I called the caretaker about the rent receipts and apparently we have to pay for those now. Fuck it. Toni’s bank statements will suffice. I’ll just have to let her claim rent.

My mother called me. She’s been off work all week it would seem. She is feeling better. We talked about her health and she was actually open-minded enough about what I had to say about using naturopathy for ailments. She can detox her lungs and become asthma free but she doesn’t seem to think that is possible. I told her to take a break from dairy. When you drink your mother’s milk one of its jobs is to stimulate mucus growth. We have adults and young kids eating like infants and then wondering why they end up with respiratory issues.

She is going through some stuff and I can sense the urgency in her. Though she puts on a strong front. Ever since she was given medication that took her to a dark place a few years ago. She is off the medication but everything that bubbled up to the surface for her in her psyche is still there. She is trying to process it all on her own which I don’t think she can do. She isn’t open to getting help because she feels that people need it more than she does. I will try and talk her into it because we cannot fix problems with the same minds that created them. We have to do things someone else’s way.

My lungs don’t feel right today. We shall see what happens. I have the next four days off and I really need to get myself right. I’m getting fat and lazy. I barely exercised in the last two weeks. I’ve just been binging shows and eating non-stop. I gained another five pounds which is ideal. I have just been feeling so lost and aimless still. I’m definitely not in control of myself. This is what leads to misery. The best version of myself is one with parameters.

Anyway, on with my day. I suspect that Toni has a long weekend starting tomorrow as well. That’s three of my four days with her around, yay. She had her bedroom door wide open the other day and I took a picture to show people at work who I complain to all the time. I didn’t snoop, per se. I did poke my head in a looked around. She does snoop. I know that because she helps herself to everything of mine. The way she lives is so sad. She has her little bed, a mirror and all of her clothes in storage totes. Her room was a mess. It stunk because of her bong. I noticed she has a plastic bag hanging off of her door knob overflowing with garbage. When she lived in her apartment alone she never unpacked. She just lived out of her boxes. It’s so sad to witness. I keep offering to take her to IKEA to get herself a dresser. She insists that she is low maintenance but I was living out of suitcases before we moved in and it is not low maintenance. I hope she works tomorrow. We will be discussing our finances tonight, we shall see how that goes.