thin in Depression

It's so difficult to lose weight. I want nothing more than to be slim. It may seem like a dumb goal but I don't care. You wouldn't understand unless you've lived as me. Having your mind tell you you're so ugly and that you won't truly be loved because of your weight. I'm so sick of this body. I'm trying though. But it just takes so fucking long. I want to be thin now. I can't stand this anymore