Questions 15 and 16 in 100 questions about me

What superstitions do you believe in or follow? Do you do certain things to avoid bad luck or make wishes in certain ways?

This question feels more like two questions in one. I’ll start with the first one I do not believe in superstitions. I believe in God and not in manifesting or luck etc. As for the second part, I don’t make wishes. I Pray and do the hard work for things in my life but I don’t believe wishes or Luck is real.

Write about a death in your family.

The death that had the biggest impact on me was my father’s death. The funny thing is I always thought it would be more of a relief than an upset and it was kind of a bit of both. My father was very sick my entire life. He had his first heart attack in his early 20’s and had 4 more over the course of his life. He also had T2 diabetes, hyperthyroidism, a stroke, near the end he developed kidney failure and for the 10 years before his death he only had around 10% of his heart working. My Older sister and I were the two of his 4 kids who helped him on a regular basis, she used to take him to his doctor appointments and i would help him with his shopping, cell phone issues, housing etc plus i was responsible for talking to him everyday to make sure all is well. Near the end I did 100% because my sister had twins. I was prepared mentally for his death, I had been told my dad was dying for my entire life. At least, I thought I was prepared. I was prepared for him to pass away in a hospital bed, possibly hooked up to machines. I was prepared for him to be very very sick , for the doctors to call and say ” you better come, he might not make it till tomorrow” scenario. At one point the doctors also prepared us because we had an appointment where they explained that they have reached the end of what they can do medically. They had tried all the meds including experimental ones, we had tried all the treatments, there just wasn’t any further. If he got a cold or anything at that point it would just be comfort care. I was Not prepared for him to be fine the day before. I was not prepared to miss the last phone call and not call him back right away because I had already spoken to him literally 12 times that day because he was lonely and called me all the time. I was sure I would get another call from him very soon anyway, I always did. I was Not prepared to have to call the EMS because my dad’s friend, who was over at the time, could not wake him from his nap. I was not prepared to have to go to his apartment and wait to meet the coroner there. I was not prepared to walk into his apartment and see his lifeless body on the floor, bright orange defibrillator pads on his chest, his skin a blue purple color. I was not prepared for the pain. I was not prepared to miss all the things I was frustrated by. I had grown to dread my dad’s phone calls. I spoke to him literally up to 20 times or more a day. He would call me about a movie or commercial he watched, he would call about something a relative told him, he would call about something he wanted to do he would call to check up on how my laundry was going. The day he passed I was babysitting my nephews and my sister and brother in law were out at a movie on a much needed date. My aunt called and said she had called him multiple times and he hadn’t answered, had I spoken to him recently. I said I had spoken to him about an hour and a half before but I had missed his last call so I’d check. I couldn’t get him either so I called his friend that had been over that day and he said he was still over but my dad had laid down for a nap earlier. I asked him to check on him because his phone wasn’t waking him. He went into the room and then in a panic said ” Call 911 I can’t wake him up, I can’t wake him up”. It all snowballed from there. I would give anything to hear his voice again. I would give anything to go back in time and answer that call. I want to know about the commercial that got him teary, I want to hear about my relatives drama, I want to tell him about my laundry! I knew it was coming, but I was not prepared!

Last updated January 17, 2023