Monday - 16.06.14 in Your Face

This morning I decided to change the furniture around in my bedroom. I am constantly trying to figure out the best way to arrange it so that I can fit all my crap in here. It never quite works, because I simply have too much stuff for this tiny room. It was a good opportunity to vacuum under where the bed was, though, and it spurred me on to clean out my closet again to re-arrange it.

I washed all the dirt and dead bugs off my car and took photographs. I posted the ad for its sale, and burst into tears. Why am I so attached to this car? It was the fanciest car I have ever owned, it was so reliable, so cheap, so good to me. Selling it will mean being without transport at a whim, everything will then need to be planned to align with public transport, or the movements of others. I am being dramatic, as I have previously gone without a car and coped just fine with my two legs and a bus ticket. Maybe I am afraid, because selling the car is the last thing I have to do before leaving. But, I am growing nervous as I leech funds from my bank account (although I have managed my budget way better than I had anticipated) and I would really appreciate the car money in there. I suspect I miscalculated my earnings and that I may be paying back my HECS (student loans) in this tax return after all. A bit of a shame, but I can't be too upset about it - I have to pay it sooner or later. I had hoped for a bigger tax return, is all.

I am surprised at how I don't miss work at all. I thought I would have missed the interaction, the stimulation. Instead, I feel relaxed and nearly content. I am not constantly watching the clock, not lying awake at night fretting at how I can't sleep and what I have to do the next day. I plan dinners and cook them well. I grumble at having to clean up after my mother and brother, but I still do it.

Lending a friend $100.00 tomorrow. I hope it's not the wrong decision. He needs it for a good reason, and I have faith in him repaying it in two weeks like he has promised.