Blah in Bittersweet

Ive been getting depressed again. My husband talked to my doctor ( at his appt) and she suggested I take the blood test and figure out what will cause less side effects. I don’t even know why. I guess stress over money and life. Every time I start to do better, T gets disappointed about sex or affection and it starts all over again. I know i never live up to his expectations and after 20 years its really getting harder and harder to maintain.

Im just struggling I guess. T wants me to get back on antidepressants but ive been really resisting. I go back to the doctor on the first so we will see what she says.

We had one hell of an outburst at work last week. We were in our Wednesday staff meeting when a client parent came in SCREAMING. She ended up verbally assaulting one of our therapists for quite a while. We should have called the cops. It was so bad the neighbors were screaming for her to shut up and a therapist around the corner heard! Like on another street! We were all just so… dumbfounded as to what to do… Her therapist eventually showed up and calmed the parent enough for them to leave safely.... Plus ethically we couldn’t discharge the client because of it. Because the clients PARENT was the one who did this and our ethical obligation is to the client. My boss said before they allow the client back the mother needs to have a zoom meeting with her and she read the messages but never responded. We all waited sick on Monday to see if they came in. They didn’t. Ive spent the rest of the week Auditing and it being pretty quiet. The therapist who took the brunt of the screaming match has been having a hard week. It caused some flashbacks that were not good so shes been struggling. Even therapists struggle....

Ive decided I want a reusable notebook for my birthday. My boss actually had one and she never uses it so she said it could be my work notebook. But its a full sized notepad and i would prefer a half page notebook. So im trying it out. I took all my notes in it. It takes heat to erase( best) damp cloth ( better) or erasing the ink ( worst) So im testing this out before I buy one lol. Im not asking her to get me one or anything. [Maybe this one] (https://www.amazon.com/Modubooq-organizer-Discbound-duratech3-technology/dp/B09SGKMVB3/ref=sr_1_135?crid=20RP8YVIAETOE&keywords=erasable%2Bink%2Bnotebook&qid=1658514442&sprefix=erasable%2Bink%2Bnotebook%2Caps%2C242&sr=8-135&th=1). Or this one? Or this one is like half the price.... wonder why.

i like too. Its pretty.

Better things right? Sigh. Im going to go spin some wool.