Local newspapers in Tales of Transhumanism

They're always hilarious. The latest edition of the Kent and Sussex Courier is jam-packed with exciting news snippets and local events. The front page, the front fucking page, is an article all about local hipster restaurant owner opening a new hotel. Important news.

Inside you'll find comprehensive and up-to-the-minute articles on a wide range of news topics, with headline such as (I shit you not) "Pub sign has wrong Duke of York on it says resident", "Grotty railway gate to be restored", and "Woman vows to slit throat of son-in-law in house row". Apparently, there is anger as "foreign drivers let off fines", pensioners are getting "trapped by ignorant motorists", and a "teenager in a roof siege threw tiles off at police".

Oh, make no mistake, it's all going down in Tunbridge Wells.

EDIT Turns out that hipster restaurant owner is the brother of my girlfriend's daughter's girlfriend, and he's a violent, misogynistic serial adulterer who beats his kids. Might have to pay the man a visit.