He read the entry in Journal 2022

I thought about it but yeah, he did. We had a conversation and he shared how he felt bad reading how much I was hurt. He shared his thoughts and I shared mine.

I feel good that we spoke, God, when we spoke I felt so excited. But also so so hurt. Why is he doing this to me? Why is he doing this?

I feel so sick and lonely. He feels awful and I don’t want to hurt him anymore. He was pissed off people where mad at me, admitted he was hurtful and said my feelings are valid.

It felt validating but so hurtful. Because, he doesn’t want me romantically anymore. I wanted to scream as it’s just dizzying.

I feel confused and just sick, feverish. I just haven’t been doing so hot, Mom was annoyed and said again, I need to see a doctor.

I just want to feel better.