hello... in A Day in the Life of Me

I haven't done very well keeping up in here, in reading or in writing, sorry folks :( had a lot on the go and on my mind and I didn't want to come in here and sob story it up every bloody time we all turned around... We've got our wedding ( semi) planned, invites sent (as some of you know cause you got one) and things somewhat arranged, but I wont lie and say I am not scared shitless. Not of the wedding or the marriage, but of everything else we DONT have done, ie his paperwork. Its 312am here, he's next to me sound asleep, and not that I begrudge him that sleep, but I do envy him his ability to do so when my mind wont stfu about every little nagging fear I have, and every tiny worry about finances and if we can get through.... Scared.Shitless. Don't think I was this scared over anything to do with the psycho ex....

Its all coming so fast now to... No rings yet, no license, no dress, and no money set side atm for the tent/food, but we got another 5 pays to get that sorted. I know he knows how serious all this is, but sometimes I don't think he realizes HOW serious... I'm struggling. 2 jobs, constant migraines from worry and lack of sleep... I'm wearing out while trying to be strong and keep this all together... keep trying to win the lotto.. that would fix everything... lol

I am slowly working through all your entries. I haven't been commenting, but I see some of you are having a tough go, sad to see and virtual hugs to you and fingers crossed everything works out for you and yours.

Think I have whined enough for one midnight session...