I've had a day from hell! in Since OD is shutting down....

So it started off pretty decent. Had an appointment this morning and then got groceries. We got home, made lunch and then my daughter proceeded to eat ALL FUCKING DAY!! I couldn’t do a god damn thing for myself because every time I tried, I had to stop to give her more food or clean up another fucking mess! It was just fucking relentless today and I realize that I HAVE to start setting boundaries with shit.

A couple of days ago I had made breakfast and a little chunk of potato fell on her plate where she didn’t notice it until after she’d eaten most of her food. Well, the sight of it made her sick so she threw up all over the floor. She’s really picky about stuff where if you don’t give her what she wants, she just won’t eat and then wants to eat snacks or treats all day! Or, she’ll just throw up. I am so fucking tired of this shit where if I don’t cook what she wants, I deal with an absolute fucking miserable situation!

Another thing, meal times are the most stressful time of the day. Anytime I make her food, I make sure she has plenty to drink and I give her EVERYTHING she needs and for whatever reason, I still get to jump up several times while I’m eating and I start feeling really sick because I can’t just sit and eat or let my food settle. This has gone on since she was eating solid food and I don’t know what else to do other than to threaten to spank her. I have such anxiety the whole time I’m cooking because I know how it’s going to be once I sit down. I am seriously concerned with how this is affecting my body and I need to figure out what we can do differently!

I actually got to shower by myself today which doesn’t happen very often, unless she’s at school. It’s been another day where all I’ve done is cook food and clean all day and I’m honestly fucking exhausted. I wish I got even an hour break sometimes!!!

My Mom text earlier asking if I was okay and I’m like no I’m listening to my daughter throw a fit but God forbid I get any kind of fucking break and I also said if you aren’t going to help or offer a solution then leave me the fuck alone! She was adamant about coming tomorrow which really pissed me off after she said she’d babysit last weekend and then not only never showed up but didn’t even offer an apology. I check her Facebook messages and her little boyfriend left a message saying, “call me” so that’s why she’s wanting to come over! Uh no, ya ain’t gonna use my child to call him!

I am so tired of dealing with people that always have some underlying motive. I literally just want to start screaming! I woke up pretty upset today after dealing with that other piece of human trash and I just want everyone to fuck off!

Then, my brother who got me to watch his kid for 24 hours last weekend hit me up and I straight told him I ain’t watching kids this weekend. Nobody is worried about me EVER having a fucking break so why should I worry about them?!?!?! My brother and his gf have their kid in school and she doesn’t have to be picked up until 6pm but then they need a babysitter every fucking weekend to be out getting drunk at the bar?! Uh no, grow up! You don’t take my kid so why in the absolute fuck should I take yours?!

Ugh, I’m just so glad that it’s almost bedtime. I just hope tomorrow is better as I’m about to lose my motherfucking mind!