Wow, this discussion has really been hitting home for me. I'm kind of a closet feminist. I sometimes listen to "Stuff Mom Never Told You" podcasts and secretly root for Hillary Clinton. I don't hate on men. I actually quite like men and get along with men in general more than women. But some of the things this #YesAllWomen thing has been bringing to light are realities.

YesAllWomen the odds of being attacked by a shark are 1 in 3,748,067 but the odds of being raped are 1 in 6. (Some areas of SD are notorious for high incidence of sexual assault)

YesAllWomen Because how often does a man text his friend to say he got home safe. (I've done this)

YesAllWomen Because when a woman is harassed or even groped in public she is told to take it as a compliment. (This happens to me a lot)

YesAllWomen when I told my husband I wanted to start riding my bike to work he asked me if I was going to take my gun.

Because the most scared I've ever been in my entire life ( except for the time I thought I killed my brother rock climbing when we were kids) is when I broke up with a guy and he flipped out.

Because if you just talk to any girl in any occupation where she is outnumbered by men (welders, coders, scientists, mechanics, electricians, engineers, PILOTS,ect) ask her how many times she has honestly thought about just saying "f this I'm out. "

You can only deal with the bullshit for so long before you just get exhausted. It's not just the dinner requests and the "you fly like a girl" comments. It's not touching me. It's not staring at me. It's not even the Good Ol Boys club I will never be allowed into. It's not the "we can be friends but only if we are fucking". It's all of these things. All of these things and so much more. Every. damn. day.

It's that day when I was a flight instructor at SDSU and one of my female students came to me, upset after a solo flight because "someone" turned her in for allegedly not doing something that I watched her do and she said she did. And she is crying and I have to sit her down and tell her there are people that want us to fail for no discernible reason other than that we are there and we are different. I was 22.

It's that day my parents were arguing and my dad grabbed my mom and threw her down and hit her. My brother and I were in the basement, zombie like in front of the tv trying to pretend it wasn't happening. My brother was about 15, just starting to broaden out, I guess I had never really paid much attention to him as he was growing up. I mean really , how often do you notice subtle changes in a person you see every day? My dad was yelling and breaking things. There was a scuffle, then the sound of a person falling down, and my mom started crying. I was glued to my seat, paralyzed , the look of horror on my face was mirrored on my brothers. He jumped up, raced for the stairs. I followed. He got to my dad in the kitchen first, my dad had his back to us and was glowering down at my mom who was laying on the floor sobbing. Eric, about a head shorter than my dad, grabbed his shoulder. My dad spun around ready to fight and Eric punched him right in his fucking face. My dad staggered back and Eric slipped in between my dad and mom, his back to mom, facing dad. He said 5 words: "I think you better leave." I was 13.

Now I'm 27. I'm sitting in my living room in the middle of the night crying because I've been harassed. I've been groped. I have been afraid-genuinely afraid. I've been singled out, targeted, taken advantage of. One of my best friends was date raped. She knows exactly who did it. Another of my friends was sexually assaulted when she was in high school. Another by a family member. This is our reality .

I know #NotAllMen are bad people. I'm married to a great one. A kind, calm, respectful one.

But this has to stop. That is all. Sarah