A Little Unsettled, A Little Dark in Everyday Ramblings

The “other” community garden on New Year’s Day. Soon, soon the surrounding fence will be ringed with daffodils. The snow is gone and now we are under a flood watch. It is above freezing and will be for most of the rest of the month and it will be wet. It was wet indeed on my way to the grocery this morning. The bus, hydroplaning its way down the big busy street.

I am not complaining. It was lovely (all geared up) to be able to go to the store.

All anyone is talking about is Omicron it seems. Two of my students have Covid now. The stories of disruption and delays and changed plans are everywhere. It is all unsettling to say the least.

It is fun to be back teaching. I would have missed it if the break had gone on longer. I did weights for the first time in just over a week on Sunday and did not lose any strength. Weight training is so empowering, literally. I can do a set of bicep curls now with my heaviest weight with my strong arm where two months ago I could barely lift the darn thing.

I have discovered that if I am taking a training class it is better not to do it live. My hip has healed fully, thank goodness and I think the reason I strained it was that I was trying too hard to keep up instead of modifying. More the pace than the weight.

Mrs. Sherlock told me this morning she thought I was strong as an ox. Ha! So not.

Lately I have been learning all about the nervous system, the Vagus Nerve and going forward the newest breakthroughs in pain science. I am doing a weekend training in that at the end of the month.

Also, the League of Women Voters stuff is coming back online, and I am going to be involved in a bunch of program planning meetings for the year ahead. And next week I am on a committee to frame questions for local candidates in our next election. I have never done any of this stuff before so this will be a challenge.

I feel like I must do something to help democracy thrive in a time where there is so much threat to it and I have pretty much been freeloading off the work of others all my adult life. I have voted in every election I was eligible to, except maybe two small ones when circumstances didn’t allow me to. And showed up for jury duty. And returned all my library books… :)

But that is not enough anymore. People are out there actively dismantling the protections we have put in place to guarantee that our rights are preserved.

One thing I have learned clearly here during the pandemic is that people can look at the same set of facts and see things a completely different way. I understand that those doing the work of the autocrats think that they are under threat and that they are patriotic and for many in line with God’s will.

All the uncertainty we are all dealing with is making that perceived threat feel closer and then there are those who without a doubt are exploiting the fear for gain and power.

Every year on New Year’s Day I pull a Tarot Card. A few years I have pulled truly wonderful cards. One year I pulled the Five of Wands, which I think of as “the strife card”. It was a hard year, after a breakup and out on my own with very few resources. The year was true to the card.

I made it through. And in the end, I hand a lot of “interesting” experiences that I can recollect and share as I went on to build a better life.

This year I pulled the Nine of Swords. A very disturbing card. I am still trying to absorb and accept the meaning of it. Worry for sure. No problem there, I am plenty worried, but it is more mental as it is an Air card. More interior, hemmed in. If Mr. Finch had pulled this card, he would have put it back.

He did that the year he pulled the Death card.

So along with teaching and the League tasks, I am going to work hard at maintaining my mental health this coming year. The cards to me are not predictors, they are doorways or portals into things unsaid and unaddressed.

I shall be inviting my demons to tea shortly.

Last updated January 04, 2022