meh in life stuff and misc.

Just ran into a lady I thought I had a spark with, out on a date with a guy much thinner and with a better earning potential than me. It's my most recent ex-girlfriend's birthday, too. None of my work prospects are panning out and, worst of all, I'm not feeling funny. I'm too overwhelmed by a sense of loss to feel funny. It kinda sucks.

I keep trying to tell myself that this is a new life that just started a week ago and these are just growing pains but it all seems too familiar for that to not be a struggle on its own.

I am trying. I am trying but it all seems to feel like... I don't know to what end I am trying.

But I keep trying.