You Can't Run Away in Journal

from your problems.
To anyone who says this, I reply with congeniality, Fuck You.

And I mean that sincerely.
The very first thing that I consider when someone says this is, how is that working out for you?, and the second is, even if it is working out, what the hell do you know about me and my situation?
Possibly, I have this reaction- this immediate desire to put distance and time between this person and me- because a cliched comment like this is an implicit attack and dismissal. An example that comes to mind- a wife with an abusive husband. It is so obvious and hypocritical a standard to use a phrase which at once attacks the victim- telling them to return to the source of their problem and just submit to it, whether or not their problem actually is a sociopath, a narcissist, a sadist, or just some dumb fuck dick. And it’s dismissive of the potential victim’s experience of being a victim of attack by attacking them for having a problem in the first place.
I am reminded of the classic example of the bully continually agitating his peers in public school- and when someone finally stands up to the bully, who gets punished? Of course it’s the victim. Of course it’s the victim. It can only ever be the victim because school system let the bullying continue until the victim expressed himself. Even if, by some off chance that an angel of virtue descends upon this hellish system, the bully were to be overtly punished, what then? The victim is still punished. What’s going to happen when the bully is set loose, once again, among his hapless peers? He will take it out on the loud-mouth who “caused” his punishment.

To be clear, I am not condemning anyone for saying this. There is no moral category for giving bad advice… especially if it is unconscious. I just have no problem judging the entire trajectory of your life by such slip of the tongue.
People, I find, tell you everything you ever need to know about themselves within about 10 to 15 seconds of meeting them. It is most astonishing that I never did take seriously what people were telling me. Yet, not so astonishing after having been trained for 20+ years to not be aware of hypocrisy and cruelty.