What world are you still living in? in Adventures in paradise

So I've finally started transferring my old Open Diary entries over to here. Gee, that took me a while to even start, didn't it? :P It's gonna take me fucking-forever, haha, as I'm only up to May 2005, and I'm pretty sure I had close to a thousand entries over there, but it's been a rather interesting trip back in time looking at the old entries, and re-reading them as I'm posting them.

Man! What a life I had back then. It was certainly more fun than it is now. Or rather, it was just so DIFFERENT! I'm still in the same city, and all that stuff that happened was in areas I still pass through occasionally to this day. There was even one entry where I was talking about how I was in a suburb called 'Spring Hill' and I had no idea where anything was LOL! Cue 10 years later, and I've lived here for almost seven years!

Life truly is amazing though. Reading back through has definitely proven my own ideas that writing a diary is one of the best things you can possibly do with your life. Especially for someone like me who forgets the real world so easily, or rather large parts of it. I've also noticed that I don't write anywhere NEAR as often as I used to as a 21-24 year old! There seems to be the occasional monthly gap between my past-life entries, but mostly I've been pretty good. I guess it's been my stubborness in not wanting to let go of Open Diary and embrace Prosebox, and the fact so many of my readers from over there never transferred over to here, and I do miss catching up on their lives.

Here isn't so bad I guess. At least it hasn't stuffed up like OD did toward the end of it's demise. And that's always good. It's just that I don't know the audience here AT ALL. It's like being the new kid at school here. Over at OD, I wrote about everything, being gay, my relationships, my religious days (God help me what was I THINKING LOL).
Up to this point in my cross-over posting, I'm still dating Luke, and I look at the entries and how cute we were together back then, and I look at the dates of the entries, and realise that I had written those NINE years ago now. Just amazing. Where would we be HAD we stayed together all this time? But it doesn't depress me at all. This is just life, and I can hardly say I haven't had a good journey in between then and now. I am definitely nothing like the early 20's guy in those entries as I am the now early 30's guy I am today! The only thing that hasn't really changed, at least it feels like, is that I still FEEL like I'm in my early 20's, but unfortunately I can't fight the aging process haha. It is really nice being told that I don't look like I'm 30 sometimes. I mean, are you just not meant to look youthful anymore at 30? It really doesn't seem that old to me. Or at least it doesn't feel like it. Maybe that's my exercise? That is a big thing that's changed I guess. I never exercised at all back then. I think Luke had only started to. Nowadays we are both pretty into it. Who woulda thought, right?

So life really is amazing. It's pretty cruisey for me, as it has been pretty much the last two years only working Part time instead of full. Yeah, I miss money, but when I think about it, money's only money and I sometimes have it and sometimes don't. No use flailing my arms about it. It is interesting these days having an Indian best friend who has grown up as part of the caste system, and therefore is influenced HUGELY by money and possessions.
Even tonight at dinner at grilled with him, his boyfriend and our friend Rick, he noticed every nice car and every woman who was carrying an expensive handbag. I said to him, "I don't even NOTICE these things!" And it's true, I really don't, unless it's thrown right in front of my face and made obvious as all hell.

I think re-posting these entries will be a lovely trip down memory lane. It annoys me a little that a lot of people from OD decided to delete their diaries and start over and their past doesn't really apply to them anymore. I get that, I guess, but I am so thankful I can read over those entries and look back at the cheerful, happy, and honest kid I was. I really was so honest back then, even in real life to my friends and my ex boyfriend Luke. I had no reason not to be. I am glad I'm still like that. Living an honest life.

I do find it quite amusing however that since I started my diary in 2004, to this day, my parents have still remained flat-lined on their view of my sexuality. Basically, in my eyes anyway, although I do realise mum has come a far way. My dad however, I feel, will age and age, and never change, and it frustrates me to high hell that his ingrained church upbringing and living in the country (living under a rock) has made him this stubborn.

My one surviving grandmother (his mum) was moved into a home in Pittsworth today, apparently. At least I think it's a home? I dunno. So she was a bit nervous as she's only ever known her farmhouse pretty much her entire life I think. Changes are definitely happening out on the farm. My childhood home will soon be no more. Mum and dad are still looking around for a house to move into, although they have looked at many so far, from what I can tell. It'll be weird visiting them in a town, rather than the beautiful farm, although, let's face it, with my father's attitude toward me, who knows when a visit will happen.

I'm only doing this to make him realise how serious I am about this not being a joke. You'd think that after 12 years of your son telling you that he's a homosexual that you'd start to think, "Oh, maybe he actually is? Maybe gays are a reality in life?" I just know he is as stubborn as I am about this. To think that the last thing he said to me in September last year was, "Grow up! Marriage is between a man and a woman" before he blocked me on facebook.

Wow. Really? What world are you still living in, dad?

Anyway, I'm not upset about it anymore. Moreso disappointed I think. Maybe a little frustration. It's almost like we need a gay pride parade to turn up on my dad's front door for him to even acknowledge our existence!

It's 4:18am. I've rambled on enough for now.