Don't hurt yourself! in The OpenDiary (OD) Days!

Don't hurt yourself! - 4/7/2005

Well I took my car in to be repaired yesterday. They were nice and rang me before doing anything extra to it other than the major service, and told me the reason it was shuddering is cos the distributor was really worn down and needed to be replaced soon, and they could do that if I wanted them to. i said 'yeah sure go for it'. It was lucky I was on a break at work when they called, otherwise I would've missed it. So $318 later, my car sounds like it should. there's still a little bit that needs to be done to it, but hey I'm sure i'll get round to that. I owe my dad $402 for insurance yet, which I'll send next week when I have the money.

Luke told me he loved me again a few nights ago. Once again I got scared, but not as much, more scared as in the way I didn't know what to say. I do love him, he's the most amazing guy I've ever encountered in my life, and I thank God for giving me the chance to know him as much as I do. I almost said it back, but something withheld me from doing so. I've thought a few times about saying it, but each time I've withheld. I hope that when I do get the guts to say it to him, it'll be in an amazing circumstance, and not when we're having sex. Not my first time saying it, maybe it will be I dunno, I'd just rather do it somewhere more public, you know. I you say it during sex, you might only ever say it during sex. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I'll prob say it all the time, I just want the first time to be special. I know I've thought it. I know I've looked directly into his eyes, with my eyes full of love for him, but just with silence - "You say it best, when you say nothing at all".

I've been listening to the lyrics of 'Rain' by Anthony Callea lately, and the lyrics have just hit me these past few days. When I first heard the song, I didn't like it, then it grew on me, now i'm obsessed with it!! I find it hard not to sing when I hear it now, it's so strange. Luke hates Anthony Callea, probably purely for the fact he's a straight-acting fag haha. Sorry to those who don't like that word, it doesn't really bother me - people call me 'fag' and i usually laugh at them, unless of course I feel threatened, then I get scared.

I did my first aid course on tuesday. I had to go to Strathpine Woolworths in the Westfield there to their training room. I was the first there and was hoping someone else would be there, but there wasn't, so I wandered around for a while with the dark skies above threatening to saturate me the moment I hopped out of my car. But thank God there was another guy with his first aid booklets, so I knew he was there for the same reason I was. i followed him and a guy let us in thhe back dock doorway. Steve and Renee from my work were suppose to be there too, but they didn't show up, so I wa the only one there from my store. I met two girls from Warner Woolworths (which is where Mick works) and they said they knew him well and though he was cool :) Karyn was the loud one, and I did know the other chick's name, but I've forgotten it dammit. Oh well. They were both really nice, and we talked a little bit. my shyness held me back a bit, but I wasn't too bad. I was so nervous abouyt the course, but our instuctor was pretty nice. I learnt a lot, I can tell you that, and I spent ages kissing a manequin(sp?) haha, and doing slings. The test at the end i was worried about, and there were a few I didn't understand despite doing my workbook and studyig the night before, but he was nice and helped me understand the question more. I ended up getting 37 out of 40, and you need 32 for a pass, so i'm happy!! Now I get to wear a badge at work so people know I'm a First Aider. i just hope no-one hurts themself!! I'll be right then haha! it was fun though, and I'm glad it's over. I should get my certificate soon, and I'll get extra pay at work! :) I gotta go to work soon speaking of that. I dropped Luke off at work this morning. He's looking at bying a car at the moment, so he's hoping all goes well with the payments and stuff. i gave him some money to put towards it, but he's saving for insurance so isn't going to use all of it. I'm so proud of him!

I think that's about it for now, I always seem to be looking forward to the weekend though. C'Mon Sunday!!

-Matt

Notes: --------------------------------------------------------------------

hey matt!! Hopefully eveything is going good and i will talk to u later. if you want to talk, i am more than willing to listen.. bye bye

[tankerbrat8386] 4/6/2005 11:27:10 PM

I love that song "When You Say Nothing At All." It's on the CD that we're using for favors at the wedding. I'll have to send you one since you can't be there.

I don't think Andrew and I have said "I love you" during sex. He always tells me afterwards. We have no problem telling each other that we love each other. It's the best feeling. I hope you get to experience it soon. [American Sweetheart] 4/6/2005 11:41:10 PM

Thank God- For a second I thought I was the only person in the world who got a little freaked out when someone tells me they love me. Thanks for the note; I like your view on it and christianity, good way to think :) Aside from that, hope your car gets..well? Cheers,

[dunoamb] 4/8/2005 9:52:48 PM

Last updated May 08, 2014