I Tried So Hard and Got So Far in Thirty-Six

How are we all this wonderful June almost afternoon (it’s 11:21am here)???? We’re doing alright. I got my 2nd COVID Vaccine today, so far so good. First one went off without a hitch, so hoping this one has the same results. I had a sore arm for like 4 hours last time. So far no soreness. Woo!

Lets see I haven’t written in almost a month again. Hah. I got thrown in FB Jail for 3 days the day I posted the last entry LOL. Some lady called trump the r word that I just don’t tolerate no matter who it’s applied to. And I asked her politely to refrain from using that word because it is offensive to some.

She replied with something like she can call anyone anything regardless of how anyone feels about it, so I woke up that morning and chose violence. I retorted with “Well then you won’t mind being called a fucking bitch” lmfao ugh i just couldn’t. So I was off of FB for three days.

We celebrated Dice’s 7th birthday. I wasn’t able to get him any treats or even anything to make him a cake this year, but they got salmon and veggies for dinner because I did actually have that on hand. Blah.

I had put out a call for anyone that was inclined to help with some necessities that we weren’t going to be able to afford, like dog food, toilet paper, laundry soap, cleaning supplies, I have a list on Amazon, which is still there....so....yeah.

I was able to get a few things thanks to some pretty awesome friends of mine. And then another friend of mine bought us a ton of groceries on Friday, so that was amazing!!! She bought us a bunch of fruit, which is amazing because we never buy it because it’s just not part of our food budget…but I love fruit! And the rats do too, so it works out. Dice loves watermelon. So I’ve frozen a bunch of chunks of it, so they can have a cold treat when they come inside from our hot (not so)barren desert lol.

It’s been over 100 for a few days now already. Still waiting on SOME rain. Any rain.

Uhhhmm, lets see what else has happened. I started sewing a bunch of hammocks for my rattos. I have a huge stock pile of fleece blankets (the $2.50 ones from Walmart) and so I cut em down (have to remove the strings at the edges because rattie feet will get caught in them) and cut out my patterns and sewed a bunch....

…then I sewed my finger LOL. I’ll include a link to the picture of that, here. It’s not ghastly or anything. I just basically pierced my finger....I should have put a ring through it. THAT would be a new trend lmfao. OMG It hurt, it’s still a bit sore. But I am just glad it didn’t go through the nail. How it didn’t, I don’t know, but thank fuck! I called Randy in because I couldn’t get the pin loose to take the needle off the machine. So he brought pliers and loosened it. Then I was like OUUUCCCHHHH. And he was like Do you wanna go to the ER or UC??? I thought about it for a second, looked at it, then was like nah, just pull it out, its not bleeding profusely, so lets just get it out.

Luckily the thread went into the hole too, so I think that helped stop any significant bleeding lol. We went into the bathroom and he grabbed it with the pliers and held my finger and it just came out smoothly. Thankfully it was metal and smooth. Oooh buddy.

It happened and I was like stunned for a second like WTF just happened??? I usually sew when I have my acrylic nails because it is easier to guide the fabric through with the acrylic, and well, that won’t happen because the acrylic would stop or break the needle before it hit my finger LOL. My finger just got sucked up underneath the foot and I didn’t pull it out in time. I’ve come very close to doing it before, but my reflexes were a bit slow that day.

It was Wednesday…June 2nd. I woke up a mess. I had dreamt about my mom and that day was FIVE years that she passed. I was just like frantic all morning. Crying, bawling, just causing a general scene. I tried to do the dishes and I got more and more upset and I was just like throwing stuff around and I broke a couple things. Randy finally just grabbed me, held me tight and that’s when I lost it.

I bawled for about 15 minutes on his shoulder while he just held me and told me it was ok. His sister was killed 5 years ago in March, also. So yeah, I just kind of cried on and off all day on Wednesday. Talked to my dad and my brothers. My dad was doing ok. We’re going to plan to go to Taos in August to see my mom. It should be nice up there at that time. Plus it’s his 69th birthday on the 24th, and it would have been their 47th anniversary. So hopefully we can head up and have a little shindig or something.

We shall see.

Thursday was a hell of a day too. I got my paycheck and watched it all fly out the window to bills. That evening my friend said they could get us groceries so we picked those up friday afternoon after Randy got his AFO (foot brace for his drop foot) adjusted so it fits better.

We had to get new brakes for the car. Well we ordered them and they came but they were the wrong ones so we’re going to stop by Auto Zone and exchange them hopefully, so Randy can replace them tonight when the sun goes down (because it’s fucking hot) and then we’ll be good to go on that.

We still need to get the shocks done in the back, but that’ll come eventually. We can’t really go anywhere until we get those fixed because its just a hazard driving. But yeah like I said, the paycheck is gone the day I get paid, so FML right.

Urgh. Anyway, so yeah, that’s that. I think that is all. Randy actually got his 2nd commission for Minis through either Twitch or TikTok (he’s @wolf_concepts) so that is awesome! He’s about 3/4 of the way through his first one, which is good. He should have it all done by the end of this month and then he’ll move onto the other one. We’re slowly getting this room rearranged too so he can have more storage space and we can move around more freely lol.

I got my sewing station set back up. I haven’t been able to find my replacement needles for my sewing machine, so I haven’t gotten back to sewing lol. I am almost done sewing all the panels for the cube for the boys and I have a few others I need to sew, then I gotta cut more. I still have two full prepped sheets of fleece and like 11 more rolls I need to prep and then cut into patterns. I can get 2-4 hammocks out of each blanket. As soon as I get more sewed up I’m gonna put those up on CL because I see all these posts for rehoming small pets, but never any for hammocks for them.

Again, we’ll see what happens there.

Randy sees the Ophthalmologist today so they can see how bad his Glaucoma is, if it has progressed and if they can do anything about it. Plus he’ll hopefully get his prescription and that way he can get new glasses. His broke months ago....and he had been gluing them together, but they are currently in 4 pieces lol, so he hasn’t had glasses in about 3 months now. Blah. I need new glasses too, but mine are covered by insurance, so whenever he gets his, I can go get mine.

We’re planning on going up to Mt. Lemmon for his birthday in July. He’ll be 35 this year. I’ll be 37, and the other day I was like “Hmmm....I’ll be 40 in 3 and a half years”. OMG The death glare I got from him was hilarious. He literally said “OH shut up!” when I said that LMFAO. I told him you know making it to 30 was hard because I’ve just been through so damn much by that point. I told him 40 is gonna be like I FUCKING MADE IT and 50 will be like Well I’m still here.....60, we’ll see if we make it there lol.

I realized that I hadn’t scheduled my follow up Appt for my Rheumatologist from March, so I did that today, I have bloodwork tomorrow and then I’ll see him on the 15th. I haven’t seen him in person since January of 2020. The weight they have me at is 280. I currently weigh 240. And looking back further in my records, the highest weight they had me recorded at was 298 back in July of 2018. So I’ve lost almost 60 fucking pounds!

The last time I was able to say that was back in 2012 when I was still taking Topamax. I weighed 247 in 2012 when I met Randy. I fluctuated up and back down for years! This is the first time in my life I’ve lost weight and have kept losing weight.

I just gotta get the muscle part going so I can further lose the fat around my belly and in my legs. Hahaha. So yeah I’m excited about that. Big confidence booster to find out I’ve actually lost 10 more lbs than I’ve been telling everyone. hah.

Anywho, I think that’s enough. If you made it this far....I commend you. Have a great week!

Last updated November 01, 2021