Sleeping with the enemy. *fuck* in 2014

I accidentally slept with him the other night facepalm... but I need something too. ;) If you know what I mean. Of course you know what I mean. It was fun and a good time, but I really gotta NOT do that.

He turned into such an asshole later that night, and the next morning. Its funny, hes always been like that too. You know how a lot of people told me to just sleep with him and he'd behave? Hes like the opposite of most men. He turns into a jerk after I sleep with him, almost every time. He wont help with the kids, he will sleep on the couch, he will be rude to both me and the kids... every.single.time. I don't get it??? Like, I just screwed you, be nice!!! Nope never.

We are finally over that long lasting flu, and now we all have colds. Not bad. I mean, well... my cold and the kids colds aren't bad. Chris just might actually be dying. He came home yesterday at lunch and slept on the couch, and after dinner while I struggled with the kids... hes got the same cold that we all had, I didn't whine, I didn't cry, and fuck no I didn't sleep, nor did I get any help from him. Its hard for me to care about him these days.

Of course I still love him. doublefacepalm But I'm not with him. I don't want to be with him forever, and I DEFINITELY do NOT see him in my future. When I look at my future, hes not there. He used to be the only thing I could think of... now I just want him to find someone else who will give him what he wants, who will work as hard as he needs her too, who will cook and clean and basically be his mother for him...and with a libido like his. I really honestly want nothing more than that for him.

Tell you the truth, there is this girl that works at our local grocery store, and I want them to hook up. Shes cute and spunky with long blonde hair, she has a 3 year old son... I really think they might get along. Would it be weird to invite her over to hang out? haha... I'm so messed up with this whole thing.

I have to get Miley ready for school!

Kristen <3