The Shire. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.

As in Open Diary.

There’s your thesis statement. Yup, not even pretending it’s a decent writing style. I’ll continue to refine my craft, including just smashing through the fourth wall like a friend fucked through a concrete wall and....

My goodness, I’m already tangenting. But you wouldn’t have it any other way. Don’t care if I’ve shared this story, it is hysterical.

See, I used to play DnD with some friends. Believe it or not, I rolled a moral Paladin. Those that know me closely will know my desire to help others. But my friend he.... He wanted to fuck everything. This is doubly amusing, as it was before he knew he was a he. (Coded as female previously - now openly transdude.)

(Or was that when I rolled a Wizard.... Do recall Airk intentionally trying to kill us, and my nukes were the only thing keeping us alive.... Whatever, I always favored Neutral Good.)

Now, Airk was the kind of DM who would indulge the frak out of us. We once were so avoiding a plotline he set up, and instead he let us take over a shoppe and .... sell cum-filled apples.

Yeah. Go on. Say it.

WTF.

We were laughing our bums off, so no harm to anyone.

So. In a plotline, we were in a dungeon. Airk did his DM dice-throwing, and on the map he was making, determined there was a small hole in a wall. Upon glancing through the hole, a guard could be seen.

So, what did my friend decide to?

He rolled to fuck the hole in the wall.

Airk had to improvise just which statistic would be checked. Humoring him, he rolled his D20.

Yup. He rolled a natural 20. Critical hit.

Well, what would you do if one of the party CRITICAL FUCKED A WALL?

I believe the wall collapsed. And for completion, Airk had him roll a d4 for … damage to the guard.

So yeah, I like breaking the fourth wall like he critical fucked a wall and had to roll a d4 for damage to his eye.

Can’t wait for next November when I write my next NaNoWriMo novel. I’m going to critical hit that novel like my friend CRITICALLY FUCKED A WALL.

So, I was successful in “reclaiming” my old Open Diary. My emotions are… Well, let’s dive in, cumsluts!

I scanned a bunch of my “olde” entries. And that headspace came back to me. Those of you that read me during That Thing I Don’t Talk About in 2004 will remember my desire to Stay Open was a shitstorm. Up until then, I was dedicating to never posting a private/filtered entry. Obviously, after that aftermath of being open, I had to change.

It’s… I can’t find a word other than persona. Because that Timmy was me, written by me, in my grey matter. But, no secret I was an attention hoe. And who doesn’t love it?

But, I’ve changed. Oh, I’m still Timmy.

It’s....

I feel so open on this website. I don’t get the (volume of) comments as I would have on OD. And… it’s okay. Because those few comments I get feel more heartfelt. More intimate. Rather than the … clickbait style I used to have?

Hey, I’ll own it.

I sooo made a mistake in “advertising” my Female Masturbation Survey. It was never my intention to offend anyone, but I took it a step too far. I’ll own my mistakes.

To paraphrase the words of Clara, well. I am always right. And if I am ever wrong, I will addendum my knowledge appendix so that I am again correct.

“You know the greatest danger facing us is ourselves, an irrational fear of the unknown. But there’s no such thing as the unknown — only things temporarily hidden, temporarily not understood.” - Captain James T. Kirk, s01e10, “The Corbomite Maneuver

I think that’s enough prefacing/backstory.

The Shire is gone. It’s not coming back. I might sparingly post entries on nuOD, but I don’t see myself leaving Prosebox. Facebook is good for small, digestible content. Fetlife is good for admiring the variety of epidermis and mucus membranes that are shared. And Prosebox is good for me to write at length to a point where I’m not even sure how anyone can endure some of my longer entries.

I feel like I’m not fronting here. I feel like I’m not putting on some persona. I feel like I’m just being me, and due to that, the connections I’ve made are that much more genuine.

To quote/paraphrase myself.... If you are yourself, you will attract those that are attracted to you. As, if you pretend to be someone you’re not, you will attract those that are attracted to that facade.

The Shire is gone.

But I’ve been building to another reference that explains my adoration of this website. This is the New Shire. At least, to me. Part of this quote has been on my profile page for years.

We can’t go back to the Olde Shire. But, we have built a rather nice New Shire here.