Breath of fresh air. in Since OD is shutting down....

Since I've applied at a few places yesterday and told my work that I need cut back on hours, I already feel more refreshed. The past 2 nights I've been getting off at my scheduled off time, I feel so much better. After I completely burnt out over the weekend, I realize I can't work as much until school is out (in like 3 weeks) and now that I have been getting at a decent hour, I'm able to work on homework some upon getting home and I've been able to eat more healthy and I'm extremely happy about that because I am so fat and I can't stand it.

I do worry that the places I've applied at are going to call my work wanting a reference and my work will fire me because in this state, they don't even have to give you a reason for letting you go. I hope that doesn't happen but if it does, there's other places I can work. I try not to stress about it because I tend to worry about a lot of shit that doesn't even happen but I would like to stay where I'm at because I'm comfortable there, I now what I'm doing and I make extra money. I'm okay with not being a manager since I probably wouldn't be able to handle all the hours anyway and it would probably just be too much for me in general.

Oh and I got my oil changed today and have a couple of things going on so I'm dropping the car off Friday morning and see about getting the issues fixed. They aren't huge issues but could turn into problems if I don't get them taken care of. I don't want to get up early but I don't work Friday night and have a class at 1 so I know I'll survive. I'm a lot happier just in the past couple of days getting off work when I'm supposed to and being able to get through the day without an iced coffee and a shit ton of water.

My Mom called me yesterday after she was a complete bitch on Easter so I wasn't very nice to her and actually told her to not call me anymore. Until she wants to be an actual Mom and treat me like a human being, she has no place in my life. I don't like how she is mean to me in one conversation and then perfectly pleasant in the next and I'm supposed to forget about the mean shit she says!? I know that my Mom is clinically depressed and in my opinion bi-polar as fuck but I'm going to hold her responsible for the way she treats me, the way she's always treated me and I'm just not going to be extremely forgiving anymore. I used to be because I actually loved her and wanted her to be a part of my life and now, well, I'm doing just fine without her.

I think now that I'm starting to catch up on sleep and have more use of my brain, I'm seeing things with my eyes wide open and realize life isn't as hard as I've made it. I thought by burning my candle at both ends would help me forget about the past, my car, my ex, my shitty family but it's made things way harder for me emotionally and I have dwelled on shit way more now than I normally would have if I wouldn't be so sleep deprived.

Not sure what else to write about. I have to leave in about an hour for work. I'm pry gonna go do the dishes, more tomorrow....oh thanks to everyone for their notes. I will respond later :)