The Power of the Mind in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

I’ve always known I’m more of an abstract being. Mental over physical. Everything about me suggests as much. I prefer more sedentary interests. My academic life was focused on the intangible elements of religion, philosophy, and law. I can quote you passages of the bible from memory and debate their merit; but I can’t put up a bookshelf. I can recite the soliloquy from Hamlet Act 3, Scene 1 and discuss it from a theatrical as well as religious and philosophical perspective on death and life; but I can’t keep a plant alive. I am at all things more Thought than Body.

This morning’s trial proved it.

It was a difficult trial and one focused on the most difficult element of court: intent.

Making it more difficult is we have 1 Witness who says “I saw this. That 16 year old was masturbating in public and I was offended.” There is 1 Witness, the Defendant, who says “That never happened, stop lying, you witch!”

Before Trial, my pain was in a good place. I had slept quite a lot last night and had a nice warm shower this morning. I was in a good place.

But as I cross-examined the defendant… his litany of swear words, insults, and attacks truly tested my ability to keep calm, cool, and professional. My hands were shaking as I sat down. The youth was incredibly agitated and said at the beginning of his testimony “Nothing could have happened, the call lasted five minutes!” Under my cross examination, he said, “You fucking idiot, the call was 3 minutes! What, I’m gonna crank it for that little?” As is my job, especially when dealing with an individual who is already more than likely lying, I had to bring this up. “Previously, you said the phone call was five minutes. Now you’re saying three. Is either true, or is it just a range?” To which he responded, “Nice try, asshole! I never said it was three minutes! But yeah, we’ll say a range. Trying to trick me like that. Yo man, fuck you!” That is a small sampling of what I experienced. The entire time, trying to be calm. Trying to keep my demeanor. Trying to stay professional.

NOW my pain is bad. My back, my shoulders, my legs. My pain is bad. This is truly spoon theory in action. I had to pull energy away from pain management and throw it to self-control. So that the pain management energy now has to build itself back up. The GOOD NEWS is that I don’t anticipate any more massive issues today. Other than Mondays being “Super Mondays” for me. The evening where I try to make up for taking too much “me time” over the weekend. So we’ll see what I can get accomplished. My hopes?

During Lunch, file paperwork.
Immediately following lunch, e-mail Prosecutors Area Training Counsel
Trial
File Paperwork
File Paperwork
Drive Home
Walk Dog
Clean Basement
Empty Dishwasher
Clean the entire Kitchen.

That’s… the goal for the rest of the day.