the parable of the drowning man in poetry

  • April 11, 2014, 10:55 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

one day a man woke up
and the first floor of his house was flooding
the street beneath him was flooded-out totally
there was no way out without drowning
so in his second floor bedroom he stayed
and to God he prayed
for help

six hours later
the waters were up to the second floor's height
so the man climbed
into the third floor attic
looked out the window
to see a whole city flooded below
so in that third floor attic he stayed
and to God he prayed
for help

by the evening
the waters were up to the attic
so the man climbed onto the roof
and from there he could see no proof
there was ever a city at all
just himself on the eaves
and the sea
so there on the roof
with no other recourse
but to sit there or drown
there he stayed
and to God he prayed
for help

by the next morning
the water did not cease its rise
the roof was now gone
he swam til he died
then somewhere else
the man sat
there before God's eyes
and asked

"I was praying all day"
"why didn't you save me?"
and God said
"well, I sent a helicopter"

what helicopter?

"well," God said
"there was a helicopter a few thousand feet up"
"around two-thirty five"
"and had you send up a flare they'd have seen"
"and you'd still be alive"
"so it's your fault"

but I don't own a flare gun
I don't even know what one looks like
I wouldn't know how to properly work it
anyway that's some pretty particular timing

so God said
"well, I also sent a boat"

what boat?

"well," God said
"there was a boat two miles away"
"around five-thirty five" "and had you swam in that direction then it would've saved you"
"you'd still be alive"
"so it's your fault"

but I had no idea that a ship would be out there
or when
and a two-mile swim
that would have been
about my limit
any other direction and
any other time
that would've been stupid
would've been suicide

so God said
"well, I sent a submarine"

A SUBMARINE?
WHEN?

"down by your first floor"
"in the night at ten-ten"
"if you had been downstairs"
"at that exact time"
"the sub would've found you"
"you'd still be alive"
"so it's your fault"

so the man said
God
you are either stupid
or you are an asshole
I don't have divine foresight
and I only had one life
it's not my fault
that I didn't risk myself
at random times
and count on luck

I didn't have the context
that omniscience
or foresight could provide
you right fuckhole
it's your fault
that I'm not alive

I prayed
I did right
and I tried
and I tried
but I did not luck
into your random miracles
you deigned to provide
you're a stupid asshole
and that is why
that's why
I'm not alive!

God just smiled "hey, I work in mysterious ways"

the man said
"you're full of shit"
"and I'll see you in hell, sir"
"good day"


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