Silly Rabbit in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

I am back in the office today. Have to be. 9 hearings and 4 trials; so… have to be.
I’m still feeling… wonky. My legs aren’t in as much excruciating pain but my back is still very fucked up. Plus… my head doesn’t seem right. Like the thinking and feeling bits. I’d rather be in bed still sleeping. BUT even if I were home, sleeping would be a problem. Massive road crews not four feet from my windows absolutely destroying the street. It’s a good thing my driveway goes to both the front street and the backstreet or I’d likely be “trapped at home” due to the construction. And I don’t know how the construction could be the problem but… ever since they started, my phone has had trouble connecting to the internet at home. SO… really couldn’t have done my hearings and trials from home today!!

I do find myself in… an emotionally weird place right now, though. OH… actually, BEFORE I talk about that.... I discovered something worth sharing. Granted, everything I’ve read and experienced proves that women get OODLES of matches on Dating Apps and Men get hardly any… that seems to be universally understood. BUT there’s also something else I didn’t take into account because I didn’t know about it. Apparently, from Moment One Nancy was a paying member for Tinder. Personally, I haven’t put money into a dating App at all (YET) . So I imagine that would also influence things. Though, once again really points out what we’re both thinking. She lost me/the house/the dog and instantly invested time, effort, and money into finding a replacement. I lost my wife and decided to “try to see what was available, if anything.” I mean… I do get it, I understand. Some women are raised their whole life to think that their safety, security, and way of life is “Find a man” whereas men are almost always raised to think that their safety, security, and way of life is their own responsibility… but still. It’s not great to have reminders that I was less “A wonderful guy with patience, compassion, and love” to her and more “A steady income, emotional support friend, and live-in servant.”

BUT to get back on track......... I do find myself in… an emotionally weird place right now, though. In updating and rearranging my schedule, my to do list, and my priorities for the week… I find that, once again, I have considerable time for “leisure” over the weekend and no real satisfying way of spending it. Tonight… I must set up the PC. As much as I need to clean my bathroom, having semi-expensive electronics sitting around IN THEIR BOXES doesn’t make me feel great. Too easy to pilfer. Not to mention, simply being able to readily access the Internet from something other than my phone would be nice. Plus as far as writing anything… HATE doing that on the phone so… some of the Text RPG groups I’m in have just had to wait for me which really isn’t fair to them. Not to mention the large amount of crap that I regretfully must buy from Amazon. I don’t like the idea of making Bezos even richer but communities like mine aren’t exactly a wealth of opportunity for purchasing Electronics, Bedding, or even housewares. Yes we do have a walmart but (even to Nancy’s great surprise) it is not a SUPER WalMart and is therefore very limited. So… biggest goal for tonight is PC SETUP. Then Friday? A typical Bar Going or Date Night Evening? THAT is when I’ll go hardcore on cleaning the bathroom. Because… yup. That’s my wild and sexy Friday Night. Then Saturday? Mow the yard, make sure the house is tidy and the dog is walked… and then sort clothes and read. Yeah.