It's not your fault - it's in your DNA in Weight Loss Surgery

I was watching this weight loss doctor - duc vong md is his name - I remember now lol. He’s on FB and youtube. He’s the one I mentioned he said my name once in a video which made me sit up and continue to watch this guy - plus he’s funny, he curses, etc.

Now with that virus going on some of his videos are on that too (if you go look him up you may see more virus videos than weight loss).

ANYWAY in one of his videos of touched on DNA.

He said that everything about who we are comes from our DNA. And most of the time we only remember out parents or grandparents. So you kinda think, oh my mom was fat or my granddad was fat and that’s why I’m fat. It’s just in your nature.

Or maybe you look at your immediate family and say NOBODY’S fat in my family, It must be the nurture, not nature, factor. It must have been the way I was raised or trauma in my life.

He was talking about how DNA goes back much farther than we can remember, or the people in our photo albums. Maybe you don’t have your mom’s nose, but you have the nose of a great great great great great great grandmother that no one can even remember.

You may not know their nose, but your DNA knows. Your DNA remembers.

So he was saying that people have been comforting themselves with food for THOUSANDS of years. That is ingrained in us, ESP in poorer cultures who didn’t have the luxury to become a shopaholic, or a drug addict, or maybe you pick at your skin, etc. There’s alot of destructive ways to comfort yourself but the easiest, cheapest, and most common way to comfort has been through food.

And as time has gone on, food has become cheaper, more accessible, and less healthy. Maybe your ancestors from the 1400s comforted with food but they didn’t have the means to buy enough to get to your stage of obesity, sugar used to be a very expensive item - they didn’t have sleeves of cookies for 99cents to gorge on.

So, the point is, there are some people that are more drawn than others to use sugar as a comfort and are more prone to keeping that fat on their body.

Not every body is the same, people don’t gain or lose weight in the same way, in the same places, in the same amount of time.

There’s a lot of fat shaming where people have either gained or lost a certain way and will look down on those who can’t gain or lose the same way. There is a lot of shame in a fat person who can’t lose or gain in the same way that it seems everyone else is doing it.

I am the epitome of that shame… at times… not 100% of the time but a lot of the time.
There is obesity in my family but it’s mainly on my father’s side, the side who abandoned us. So I didn’t get to relate or fit in to that side of the family.

My mom is not FAT. Not like I am. No one on my mom’s side every got to be my size. My mom said she gained 60lbs with her pregnancies and she’s 5ft so she must have felt very fat at that time.

I don’t ever remember my mother FAT. Or at least it didn’t really seem to hit her tummy much, her thighs, butt, and breast were thick, I guess you would call it, but that’s an attractive body type. But still being 60lbs heavier made her unhappy.

I have always been a roly poly kid, my sister has always been thin. My sis was also way more active and energetic than me, it is what it is, DNA…

I don’t know when she decided to get her act together and start WW and exercising. I think it was born our of loneliness. After she was divorced she was still young (under 30) and surrounded by friends who had bf’s or were dating. She had talked to me and told me she was lonely.

Maybe that was an inappropriate convo to have with your tween but she had no one, her parents were gone, she didn’t have many friends, she was stuck with us - and I was more mature than most my age so I could understand.

So we both got on weight watchers and did exercise tapes. Maybe I was 12.... and she lost weight and I didn’t.

I already had shame for my body being fat at school. I wanted a bf, I wanted attention too. No one paid attention to me. I was fat and 4 eyed with unattractive hair. No one cared.

Now I was only gaining while my mom was losing. Truth be told I was sneaking more treats and she was skipping her lunches. And I didn’t really like the tapes, I wasn’t as motivated as her. So she did better overall and I’m where I am now. Gaining every year my entire life.

And all my life I’ve been trying to go the exercise and calorie counting route and I don’t have the willpower or motivation to make anything stick and I hate my body for not responding the way it seems everyone else’s it.

Well now it’s coming out that there’s like 5 people around me who have gotten this WLS and not said anything to me till they were like 100lbs down.

Meanwhile I was hating myself thinking that every one can control their cals and exercise hard enough to lose weight BUT me. And we weren’t even on the same playing field, you know?

I mean, my mom did it. But it didn’t work for me. My sister couldn’t do it either! She got on drugs! She didn’t hide that fact but I don’t wanna get on drugs, I don’t. I really don’t.

There’s a whole community around me that has this secret weapon that I’m just now attempting to get because I never, NEVER, will be able to lose 100lbs on my own. Nature, nurture, DNA, will power, whatever the cause I will never get there on my own. And certainly not as quickly as hopefully this surgery will work out for me.

I think I’m letting this all out because I do feel a little bad that this is what i have to do to lose weight. I’m going to let someone cut body parts out of my body, risk infection, etc. because I’m too fat. I want to do this but I do feel bad it’s gotten to this point that I have to do this.

But I want to stop blaming myself and hating myself. And if I have to reach back thousands of years and blame my original DNA for my unhealthy state then I guess I will. And only because some doctor actually believes this! I couldn’t have thought this up myself LOL. But hell, I’ll take it if it takes some of the self loathing off of my own shoulders…

Last updated December 21, 2020