Going Through Today's Thoughts in 2020

It’s Monday in a very hot FL week. I saw the red line staunch on my outdoor thermometer just beneath 100 degrees yesterday afternoon. I was annoyed with my getting older body that all at one time broke out in sweat from my head to my foot.

Let’s see, my son is back at work after a week’s vacation from “the beat.” I didn’t get to hear anything of real interest about the marches here and how the law enforcement handled things because he visited with his lady friend and her little boy. It was’t a time to talk about those issues although she shared some really meaningful comments about anger in our black communities. I was so appreciative of her comments and her being kind enough and informed enough to speak.

Today was the day of my four month appointment with my doctor. I spoke to her for the first time about my observations concerning my aging brain, given my family history and the results of my DNA health scan.

We agree that this is just something to keep watching. I was speaking to her about what it is like for a person with a large vocabulary to be speaking and repeatedly not finding a common word, almost always a noun, of course (nouns are the first to go studies show). And speaking to her I realized that each word has a what I call a “feeling” that belongs to that word. I suppose studies refer to what I call a “feeling” as a “sense” When I can’t find a word I need to use…I experience it as a blank but that blank signals me a feeling, unlike the words I try to put in its place....only when I find the word or someone supplies it…does that blank feeling disappear.

There’s something very interesting in aging when a person is self-observant. I’m curious about how it is and will be for me, a single person, to experience aging. Ditto, when a person is isolated and has unbroken time to observe nature as it changes and is challenged. I’m finding this period of my life very informative. I rather like it.

I liked other life periods, too. Diaries underscore that.

I’m reading a collection of things that Lincoln left in both personal and private letters and in recorded exchanges with others, as well as his writings as President about emancipation, people who were slaves, and about people of color who were freed. His thoughts are very compelling as he struggled to separate his views in this many layered situation. He long had, apparently, a feeling that slavery was wrong, but no such early feelings about the equality of the races…nor as was also true of the era… of equality of men and woman, I might add.

Last updated June 22, 2020