Reflection in Current Events

Yesterday I met up with Toni and Ashley at the Forks for a bite. People really are returning to the world. Well, in my city at least. It’s a food court situation there and I settled for The Taste of Sri Lanka. We all know my weakness for south Asian food. This particular venue has a lot of vegan options for me but they never have their dosa available. I want some damn dosa dammit. Afterward, I dropped Ashley off and she asked me to pop in to check out her place and to say hi to her wife. I don’t know how it happened but I ended up talking with Sara, her wife, for hours. It was nice to talk about my take on politics to somebody in person. With somebody on the left. Ashley warned me not to bring up Trump because Sara hates him. I couldn’t resist. It’s not that I’m a huge supporter but I can at least make Trump make sense now that I at least try and challenge what I’m being shown in the media. I can tell that she is not as left as she thinks she is. She is terrified to just say the wrong thing and get attacked by the mob. It already happened because she posted an update about her sick cat during the blackout for George Floyd moment on social media. We got into a lot more than just politics. We got into this spiritual journey that I am on and she wants to get together again. She and I have never really had a real conversation about anything before. She was always afraid to say the wrong thing because I am a POC but now she knows that I am a safe place to explore ideas with because I do not need freedom from speech and I am not a leftist narcissist who absolutely needs someone to agree with zer without any small differences of opinion. Well, anymore. Unfortunately, those small differences of opinion have pushed a few people away from me but that’s okay. I don’t like fascists. I don’t want to move to Antifastan. At the end of the day, it is my job to like me. It is my job and my job alone. I don’t need to externalize my power.

Speaking of Chinada, the way Trudeau treats the press makes the way Trump treats the press look cute. I’m just discovering how bad he truly is. He had an author interrogated for writing a critical book about him. He has conservative journalists physically removed from public spaces that he holds press meetings at. Literally Trudeau was taken to court and lost. He’s doing it again knowing it is criminal but this time he hired five lawyers. Yo, we’re not Russia or China. Not yet anyway. This egomaniac terrifies me and I want him out of parliament.

I’m becoming obsessed with political stuff and I know it is because I am trying to create some distance from doing my shadow work. From focusing on myself. From working toward my goals. I need to start keeping the promises I make to myself. I finally looked at myself in the mirror today. Sort of, it wasn’t a long hard look. I need to appreciate my body more. I don’t like the way my abs look. My skin looks old. My acne scars are still triggering some dysmorphia, my facial hair is not filling in the way I want it to. But hey, I have my health. I treat my body right and it returns the favour. I suppose that it’s my mind I have to treat right then, maybe? Anyway, the sun is just about set and it’s still hot out and the fireflies make the outside feel like magic so I’m going to go sit outside for a bit.