Vanity in Current Events

I was contemplating returning to Facebook yet again and then for some reason that led me to instinctively walk right up to my mirror to fix my hair for some reason. It’s been at least six months since I last saw my reflection so I got pretty flustered. My hairline looked fucked during that one-second glimpse from across the room. I think I have a problem with sebum and I can’t figure out how to fix it. I switched to specific shampoos when I grew my hair out so that it wouldn’t strip my hair of all my natural oils so that I could keep my curls. Maybe that did me in? I had since cut that hair off. I did go vegan four years ago so maybe I have a vitamin D problem? I’ll get D2 supplements. I can start taking cold showers to get better circulation on my scalp? I don’t think that I need to start creating concoctions for my scalp just yet. I do have a dandruff situation for the first time also. Man, this bums me out so bad. I would talk to my doctor about it but if he had any solutions for it he probably would have used it lol. Aside from the fucked up hairline the rest of my hair was full and luscious. I still need to get it cut though. I need a face mask for that. 0 cases of C19 in my province though. A group of people were fined for trying to drive north to visit family. Tsk tsk.

While I’m being vain, I looked into how to level up my skin routine game. Turns out I been doing everything wrong. My skin has been feeling great since I checked that. I can layer products and still feel like my skin is breathing. There is a proper method for everything! Also, I found a vegan retinol that I might buy. Sure, I don’t look at my reflection as a whole but rather just at what I need to look at and then I get out of the mirror as quickly as possible but when I looked at my acne scars a few weeks ago I noticed that it was improving. I started using my PMD and Dermaroller again. I haven’t touched my facial hair in over two weeks. I have been slacking on the minoxidil and so I am going to be better at that. I’m trying to grow a beard but my race is not good at that so I’m cheating with minoxidil.

I have another tonsil stone. My throat has been sore for weeks now and I recognize what is happening. This is so gross. I looked into the causes and solutions and all I can think of is that I switched toothpaste a few months ago. I got a charcoal fluoride-free one. Also, I floss like crazy but I been slacking on the brushing so… easy fix! Do I even adult? I want to get mouthwash but they burn ulcers in my mouth. My mouth is super sensitive but I suppose I could water it down.

I took three days off from exercising. I am overdoing it. I’m also using it as a distraction. I can look at my body in a mirror without hesitating but I still experience some dysmorphia. Blah. I need to assemble a training program for myself. Also, I have been eating like shit lately. Vegans can eat like shit? Oh yes! I have been eating a lot of processed mock meats and fries and that’s because I been too lazy to get creative in the kitchen. I seem to be in a what’s the point? mentality.

I was feeling a little depressed yesterday but I think it was because of that series I wrote. It laid out my soul. I will watch the episode where Teal Swan talks about how to heal those wounds. I assume it will be about taking personal responsibility. I need to restore faith in myself. I really need to balance my head out. Everybody is meditating and I just can’t bring myself to even try. My ego is in complete control right now. Ok! Maybe today will be the day I do something different? Do something right?

[TMI Warning]
I am thinking that I will be trying to do the whole… no ejaculating thing for 30 days. I don’t need to for an orgasm so I guess that would be cheating? There’s just so many hippie trends going on and I have to try them all. The benefits on that go on and on and I do love a useless challenge.

Last updated May 27, 2020