2 months 1 week post op in Pudendal Decompression Surgery

Good Things
1) Got to see a particularly hilarious livestream of Mike Shinoda today to where it digressed into seriously cramping style abdominal laughing.
2) My mom and I talked about a book we have both been reading.
3) The horrendous pain I woke up with changed presentation at least at SOME POINT mid day. That means things (albiet bad) are at least changing presentation more often than before.
4) I did some more letter writing which I’ve always loved doing for people.
5) Got to take a bath and sort of reset from a bad place mentally for awhile.

Bad things
1) This morning the digestive pain AND the nerve pain made a weird type of presentation of the pain that I dont quite remember. The digestive pain can cause me to have headaches too.
2) Having issues with going to the bathroom and digestion, these last few days. I have looked at my food log and figured out where some issues could be but also, there’s really no way to ever know.
3) I just wonder how I am ever going to be around people with all these embarassing issues. Makes me wanna cry
4) My mood/ emotions are shitty today. I was in a bad headspace earlier, and still kind of am.
5) The Central Sensitization is back, I can feel the spot on the left side of my forehead zap as well as sciatic nerve crosstalk. Maybe that’s why my anxiety is starting to act up.

COVID 19 roars on
Virus damage report: 1,560,000 total confirmed in the USA, deaths: 92,235
ILLINOIS: 98,030 total confirmed and deaths: 4,379