Humpty Dumpty in Current Events

I think I can finally put into words how I feel. I had no context for feeling betrayed and deceived. Somebody asked me if it was possible that it was myself. I don’t want to sound melodramatic but I now think it is. I’m on the opposite side of a lot of my old beliefs. My beliefs, my ambition (how I see the world) and my values are all rapidly changing. It’s too heavy to talk about everything going on in my head right now. Not on PB anyway. Not publicly. I do wish that I had somebody to talk to. My heart, my mind and my soul are all a mess right now. I can cope, I’m not falling apart, I promise. Kind of the opposite really. Yes, I know I’m being cryptic and existential as always. Long story short, I never stood for anything and I can now see how I’ve fallen for everything. Like a sucker. It’s okay, I can forgive myself. I think I’ll feel better now that I understand what is causing me to feel so depressed. I think I’ll be whole again soon. I mean, trying to know yourself is like a flame trying to burn itself. We’re an event but I’ll have a new… upgrade? New optics? New understanding? Innerstanding?

Here is some melodramatic emo music to cringe along to: