Dream Dream Dream in Current Events

I went to collect my check yesterday and a few people started to cry because they missed me so much. It was weird. I don’t feel too attached to that place. Apparently everybody keeps talking about me and I had just walked in on another I miss Tom conversation. All of the managers were in a meeting so I had to wait so I got to visit a bit with some of my ex-coworkers. I didn’t see Becky with the good hair but Nicki Manage and Maria-Maria came out of the office and they both had sad face once they saw me and they said that they missed me so much. Work hasn’t been fun. Apparently everybody is acting as if I died. I love my fans. They really want to rehire me once the store is allowed to hire again. So I do have that option in the future. I’ll be honest, I just got my first full check with a minimum wage and I miss my old salary lol. I even dreamt that I got a promotion and Becky with the good hair was telling me that she pays her assistants $23 an hour. I wish! The situation of the world felt pretty real when I went to my bank to deposit my check. I was met with a security guard who had to ask me questions about if I travelled or if I’m showing any COVID symptoms. Then he explained to me what all the orange tape meant on the floor. The clerks were all wearing gloves and masks. It didn’t occur to me that when Ontario forced all non-essential businesses to close that it would have forced Big Brother Canada to end its production. Which it did.

So I’ll be leaving shortly to get some groceries… I don’t think my city is panic shopping yet but I imagine that there will be a lot of tension. I need to get my prescription refilled… I could wait until Monday if I really wanted to. Yeah, I think that I will do that. Friday doesn’t feel like a good time to be out and about. I’ll just have to get creative in my kitchen this weekend. Oh! Is it actually racist to call COVID-19 the Chinese Virus? I’m actually asking. The Spanish Flu, Ebola, West Nile etc were all not racist so I’m just confused.

Last night I also dreamt that I went for a run but I was kind of in slow motion. It reminded me of my old reoccurring dream that I had before I “came out” in which I would be running and then I would kind of end up on all fours to grab the soil beneath me to gain enough momentum to leap into the sky to try and fly. I would clear houses and fields but I would always crash land. I would always wake up just as I crash-landed of course. The absolute last dream of that I had was when I just came out. It was the middle of the night and I was running in the woods near the area that I used to go to bible camp. I leaped into the air above the lake and below me, I saw my reflection in the water. Behind me was the full-moon and I could see that I had wings. Only they were tattered and torn and unlike in my other dreams, I didn’t wake up when I crash-landed because I landed in the water. I got my wings tangled in the seaweed and I had to rip them off. Just as I broke the surface I woke up… lol anyways in my dream last night I think it just meant that I feel like the world is slowing down as I am trying to speed up. My old reoccurring dream, I suspect, was just about me trying to free myself, I never had that dream again after I came out.

My lungs still feel tight. It almost feels like I had a cigarette. I’ve just been lethargic these last few days. Respiratory issues? My sister’s asthma acts up this time of year and I’m in denial about that. I just want to go for a run today but the air is filth because of these dirty roads and snow mould and I will feel absolutely wrecked again. Oh well! I’ll just get wrecked then. I’m getting cabin fever. If Matt comes home from working in Ontario he will have to be on self-quarantine which means that the rest of us will be on self-quarantine so that will be great. My selfish side is already hating how crowded I feel already. I’ll get over it. I do just want us all to be safe and sound.

Last updated March 27, 2020