Survey Entries in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

So, I’m stealing surveys from y’all.
I had hearings, I filed motions, I did work. Since my only social interaction anymore is pretty much writing words on websites… here’s my social interaction for today:

Do you play Pokemon Go? If so, what level are you and who’s your buddy?
I do not. I know many who do play but I don’t have the… motivation… to do that, I guess.

Do you ever sit indoors and wear sunglasses or a hat?
No, I do not. I may when I start using my three season room more but doubtful as I do not own sunglasses.

Are you putting off doing something right now? If so, what is it?
Technically, I suppose so. I could continue to clean my desk, organize my calendar, work ahead. But I’ll tell you honestly… the idea of “getting all of my ducks in a row to be prepared for anything at work through October” doesn’t hold a lot of meaning for me when I’m in my current mood. After all, every day for the next many looks pretty identical right now and I’m not exactly thrilled about that.

What’s the most daring thing you have ever done?
Free jumping, most likely

Do you know how to read animals’ behavior?
For the most part!

What would be something that made you think less of a person you just met?
Instant bad manners and chip-on-shoulder attitude

Are you like me and hoard notebooks and pens?
Yes, Martha would actually yell if I came home with another notebook because there were too many “sitting around” that weren’t getting used.

Do you like playing video games? If so, what do you usually play?
I love video games. I play many of them but these days I’m revisiting my two favorite franchises FABLE and BORDERLANDS

Are you sitting in front of or by a window? What can you see out there?
There is a window behind me looking at a water tower and a window beside me looking at a church.

Are there any coasters on your table? If so, do they have text or pictures?
No coasters

Have you ever sewn a garment?
Not really. I’ve mostly unsewn (used the seam ripper to reclaim fabric for the Costume Shop)

Why do you take surveys on Bzoink?
On what? I’m just stealing surveys from other PB users!

Do you have a song playing in your head right now, too?
“Where is my mind” by the Pixies

Do you ever dance to the song playing in your head?
Sometimes but rarely

How are you environmentally friendly? Or do you just not care?
I recycle when and how I can but the honest truth is America fucked it up, like always, by putting the onus on the individual instead of the corporation. Back in the day Soda Companies used glass bottles and discovered it was cost effective to reuse those bottles. Have people bring the glass back, it would be shipped to the bottling plant, washed, and reused. Now? A very different, very worse system.

Back in 2004, were you into that The Sims story craze?
No. I typically used Sims the way I assume most people used the old sims games. Build various houses, use cheat codes to build THE BEST house, play a family for a while until you get bored, destroy all the houses and start over.

How long have you had an online presence for?
My first e-mail and Instant Messenger use was… gosh, maybe 1997? So… 23 years now?

Don’t you hate it when people answer to surveys with one word answers?
No. HAH!

When paying for things, do you prefer NFC payments or cash?
BOO! Neither. Just let me use my cards

Isn’t it cool how we can google anything, anywhere we are, in seconds?
It would be far more cool if people were capable of sorting opinion, fact, and bullshit

Or do you just never google anything and just ask others to do it for you?
I tend to google shit constantly

If you got a chance to go to space, would you?
Provided the experience was more “commercial and luxury” than “scientific and sterile”

Ever watched a cat or a dog sleep and run/twitch in their sleep?
Yes! Love that. Especially when it demonstrates the individual differences in the animal. Kody was different than Hope was different than Rocky was different than Nala

Have you ever had an “adults’ toy”? If so, how often do/did you use it?
I have not. Though, in truth… I would love to own a Sybian and invite people to use it. The thought of bringing pleasure to others sexually is thrilling and, even if I am not the one actively doing it, the thought that I could help in some way makes me happy

Do you read erotic stories or watch porn? (No, 50 Shades doesn’t count)
Yeah but less than I once did. Strange, that. When I was actively married but in a celibate relationship… porn and Chyoa all the time. Now? I’m too busy trying to keep Nala entertained or processing my feelings.

Do you do your own nails or do you pay for someone to do them?
I do my nails by which I mean I bite the fuckers down to invisible little bitches

Are there any plants in the room you’re in?
No. My office does not have plants as it does not receive enough sunshine

Have you ever cold brewed tea or coffee?
Nope

What’s something we do every day but they don’t depict in movies?
random occurrences that have no impact on the plot or character development. It is essential in a limited medium to maximize the use of time and visual so everything has to mean something but… in your day how often do things happen that just honestly DON’T have a meaningful impact on you while also not furthering a plot or story arc of your life

Do you enjoy traveling?
I haven’t done it NEARLY enough. I enjoy seeing new places well enough… though the actual flying or long driving is less fun

Where’s the most beautiful place you’ve been to so far?
Hawaii. My best memories may be in Austria, but the most beautiful has been Hawaii.

What’s something cool about the city/town you live in?
HA! Best I can say is that a river runs through it

Which body part do you think you touch the most throughout the day?
Face, sadly. I know that is a huge no no in Coronavirus Days but it is true.

What’s your highest level of education?
Juris Doctorate

If you were to open a business, what kind of business would it be?
Complicated Bar. Arcade and Over 21 Bar on top floor; Coffee House and Comic Book Store on bottom floor.

What’s the most important thing in any kind of relationship?
Trust, kindness, and understanding.

What do you do when you have an itch in a spot you can’t reach?
Find a way to scratch it.

If you wear lipstick, what’s your favourite colour to wear?
I do not

Is your style feminine, masculine or somewhere in the middle?
My style is “Professional Office Drone”

Do you usually carry a backpack, a shoulder bag or something else?
Sometimes I carry a dossier

Have you ever made your own jewelry? If so, what have you made?
Gosh, as a kid my Mom had us do every craft activity known to man! So every kind of kid-friendly DIY Jewelry

Do you wear glasses?
I do not own any sunglasses, but I am hoping that I can change that after the next fiscal year. But I do wear RX glasses

If so, have you ever tried to fix them when they’ve broken?
I have glasses with a prescription so I always try to fix them when broken

Have you ever made a friend online who lives in another country?
Yes… ish. Only through Prosebox

Are there a lot of dragonflies around your house?
None at all. Sometimes fireflies… often bees.

Have you ever seen two dragonflies mating?
I did see that once! In scouts!

What smell brings back a memory for you?
Smell is a powerful memory trigger!

What’s the best foreign film (and not made in Hollywood) that you’ve seen?
I’ve seen a lot… probably have to say “Old Boy”

What’s a song you just can’t stand?
“Renegades” by X Ambassadors. I think the lead singer has a lisp or something because every time that song plays, it sounds like he’s signing Rene-gauge and it bugs the ever loving hell out of me

In your ideal profession, would you need a work uniform?
No, but I would receive a yearly stipend for Professional Clothing

Are you excited for the upcoming summer season?
Not exactly. I’m happy to have the sun out more so I can get shit done but… summer is going to be tough with me not having a romantic or sexual focal point

Will you have a Valentine this year, or did you, if Valentine’s has passed?
Valentine’s has passed. Martha was on a sleep over date with another man and I got blind stinking pissed at home.

Who do you want to hang out with?
I wish I had a more realistic response here but.... a wish granting genie. I want three wishes, damn it! Or… barring that, I suppose… I wish I could hang out with a CosPlay celebrity who would help me improve my costume making and make up effects while being able to introduce me to people within that particular Global Social Network.

What conditions do you need in order to fall asleep?
They’ve certainly changed!! Originally, pitch black and dead silent. Then it became “a body next to me”. Now it is… some kind of weight/heat near me on the bed and some form of white noise.

Do you like Vick’s vapor rub?
Usually a non-entity in my life. I don’t get chest issues, I get everywhere else issues

Are you currently learning a new language?
Not presently. I would love to learn Japanese before MBFITWW and I go there… whenever that is. Maybe that’s what I’ll do this summer. Hole myself up in the basement and learn a language.

What culture are you most interested in learning about?
I love cultures. If I could afford it (time and money) I’d get a PhD in Irish History and a PhD in Japanese History

Are there clothes in your closet with the tags still on them?
Almost no chance on that. I need to buy some new clothes and I would love to get my clothes tailored but… that is unlikely.

What’s your favorite color?
Green, Purple, Black, Red

Do you own anything skull print?
I may still have a Death’s Head t-shirt

Are you a virgin?
Nope. Haven’t been since 2005. But… it would be nice to… I guess… shall we say… broaden my experiences

Which ex of yours means the most to you?
Buffy… then Martha

Have you taken prescription medications that didn’t belong to you?
Nope, never. I’m a true Goody Two Shoes, like it or not

How are your social skills?
They can be excellent but I’m too much out of practice these days, sadly. I seem to be far more “professional and professional demeanor” these days. I need to figure out a way to fix that somehow.

Have you ever stayed at a hotel for longer than two months?
No, I have not. My father suggested I do so when I first moved to Tiny Town but that always seems like a massive waste of money.

Do wooded areas freak you out in the evening or night?
Not really. It depends on the wooded area. The pitch black, no lights, no people, just you and miles of foreboding forest in the middle of nowhere… yeah. The mostly black, ambient light, a few people at a campsite, you and miles of forest in the middle of nowhere… no.

Do you ever go outside to look at the stars?
Sure! In fact, sometimes at night I’ll go outside to check on the dog and just look up and marvel at all the stars I can see. That’s one thing rural living does give me. And one thing that, if I could get Dad out here, he’d appreciate.

Who breaks away from the kiss first?
It honestly strikes me as odd that I can’t remember the last time I was kissed or kissed someone.

Do you know what you weigh?
212… which is better than 235, how I started 2019… and is better than my longtime plateau weight of 220… but I could still stand to lose about 60 pounds.

Are you happy with your weight?
Not at all.

What is your sexual orientation?
Mostly straight

Have you ever smoked anything other than tobacco?
I have not. Far too goody two shoes

Have you ever ridden on the back of a motorcycle?
Not that I can recall; though I did ride on the back of a MoPed in Bermuda

What was your first alcoholic beverage?
Beer, being foisted into my hands by my brother

Do you like Steven Tyler?
I don’t spend much energy contemplating this notion nor do I intend to

Baby Lips or EOS?
My family represented Blistex for decades

Does the color red look nice on you?
Sometimes. If appropriately layered with some darker colors.

Do you say koala bear or simply koala?
Never gave it much thought.

Do you like writing English essays?
I enjoyed them immensely. If only legal writing were… so appropriately frivolous

Do you usually travel anywhere in the winter?
No where farther away than my parents for the holidays; which means an hour or so drive south.

Do you wait for someone else to take the garbage out when it’s full?
I typically try to wait until the night before trash day, then cram all of the trash into a single bag

Do you think long, straight hair is pretty?
Yes, but as a wise man once said, “Simply because I say this is pretty does not mean ONLY this is pretty.”

How many CDs (roughly) do you own?
Dozens, most of them scratched or inoperable

How much money did your last vacation cost?
Literally? Nothing.

Have you ever taken a physics class?
I have not. Seemed far too “advanced science” for my skill set

Do you still have any living grandparents? If so, how old are they?
All of my grandparents are dead. Ellie at 1993; Bill in 2002, Lois in 2003, and Kent in 2016 or 2017

Have you ever driven a truck?
Does a UHaul count?

What are your thoughts on celebrity idolization and ‘fangirling/fanboying?’
I would argue that this question asks about two specifically different phenomena. Celebrity Idolization and the obsessing with celebrity as “role model due to wealth and fame” is absolute rubbish that should be done away with post haste. ‘Fangirling” and ‘Fanboying’ to me is the idea of being in the presence of a celebrity you admire and “geeking out.” That is entirely acceptable and something I have done, truth told. When I was able to tell J. Michael Tatum how much I appreciated his work, I fanboyed a bit. And if I ever met Michael J Fox or John Cusack or Jet Li… I likely would fanboy as well.

What is the messiest area in your home?
My kitchen, hands down

Who was the last person you called?
Likely something from work.

What’s your favorite computer game genre?
I like… almost all of them. I enjoy RPG, RTS, games like Diablo. I suppose my favorite Computer Game (speaking strictly computer and not console) is Vampire The Masquerade Bloodlines

Do you have any exes your parents never liked?
They didn’t like Aku for obvious reasons

Do you ever keep things just because they might be useful someday?
Not often, I’m more likely to sit on something for no reason than throw everything away and then realize I probably needed to keep something

Do you take public transportation to work?
Iowa does not have public transportation. Don’t get me wrong… Iowa City and Ames have PT… Waterloo, Des Moines, and Cedar Rapids has some… but 90% of the state has literally zero public transportation options.

What extracurricular activities did you do when you were growing up?
Orchestra, Dance, Volleyball, Tennis, Thespians, Mimes, Improve Troupe, School Play, Night of One Acts, V-Tech, Swimming, Basketball, Choir, Show Choir, Swing Choir, Boy Scouts

Has anything unusual happened to you recently?
Define ‘unusual.’ For most people interacting with sexual assaults would be ‘unusual’ but that is weekly for me. I guess unusual for me would be Martha moving out.

Do you like chicken korma?
Honestly, never heard of it.

Are you frequently in a bad mood?
My mood is typically somewhere between sad, angry, and numb

Do you ever fill out surveys while in a bad mood?
Rarely.

What was the last type of tea you drank?
When my throat was KILLING ME I had a lot of tea… I think the last cup was peppermint

Have you ever been severely mentally ill?
That depends on how you define it, I suppose, but when I was unable to walk and unable to sleep for weeks on end- yeah, I was experiencing some dramatic mental health effects.

What was the last website you were on, before this one?
Gmail

Where is the most interesting place you could go that’s within day-trip distance from your house?
That entirely depends. I could reach Mall of America in 2 hours; Kansas City in 4 hours; Chicago in 6 hours; St. Louis in 6 hours; Indianapolis in 8 hours; Mount Rushmore in 12 hours, Dallas in 12 hours, Kentucky in 12 hours

Do you ever rearrange your furniture?
I used to all the time but when we got the house, things felt settled and I liked it. After Martha finishes moving everything out of the house… may have to reassess.

Have you ever been to Toronto?
Actually, I haven’t! I’ve been to Victoria, BC and I’ve been to Thunderbay (a LOT) but never to Toronto

Have you received financial help from your parents in the past 5 years?
I regret to say yes

Are you a fast or a slow eater?
I am lightning fast in most instances. I have largely been in careers requiring a timeclock/punchclock which teaches you that time is money

What room(s) of your house did you last vacuum?
The basement

How old were you when you had your first relationship?
12

Why did your last relationship end?
Because I needed some sign that she cared about me… some indication that I wasn’t “Man who provides” and was actually a person that she cared about

What was the last thing you purchased from a small local business?
Food, I’m sure.

Do you get dental checkups at least once a year?
I don’t sadly. I used to but… Dental Insurance isn’t exactly a premium for Iowa Government Benefits apparently

Is there anyone in your family/household whom you frequently argue with?
I often argue with my father who is becoming more and more a passionate Evangelical Conservative Literalist Christian Republican

Do you live in a high cost-of-living area?
Not at all; it is one of the best positives of living in a rural community

Have you ever used chewing tobacco?
Nope. No interest at all

If you could change one thing about today, what would it be?
I’d have the energy and the motivation and the ability to do everything I wanted and needed to do

What clique were you in in high school?
I tended to float between groups a lot… I was the “Theater Kid” though if you want a definition

Would you liked to have lived in the 50s?
Only if it meant I would be in an infinitely better financial and social position than the one I find myself in today

Did you go to prom? How was it?
I went to both. I went to Junior Prom with Buffy as a date, that was nice. I went to Senior Prom with Aoife and a whole large group of ladies. It was meh.

What is your favorite cover of a song?
The Sunday’s “Wild Horses”

Have you ever been to France?
No, but I’d certainly be curious.

Have you ever been in love with someone who was fatally ill?
Not yet.

Are you Puerto Rican?
Not even a little.

Who is your favorite character from Romeo and Juliet?
Benvolio

Have you ever been to New York?
No, but I’d certainly be curious.

What’s your hair color?
Brown with grey creeping in

Do you own any diamonds?
My wedding ring has 3 small ones

Have you ever been on a cruise? To where?
I was one one cruise as a child. Having been on one or not, I don’t see the appeal

What is your favorite kind of liquor?
Whiskey or Rum

Have you ever been to jail or prison? For what?
I have been to visit clients and/or work

Have you ever been to Chicago?
Often

Is grammar important to you?
It is, but it is not the most important thing to me

Have you ever received or given a make-over?
Neither one… though I wouldn’t mind receiving one, I’ll confess

Are you English?
More so than my bloodline suggests, lol

Have you ever been a nanny or hired one?
I’ve been a babysitter before

What do you do to make cleaning more enjoyable?
Music, TV, something in the background to keep me energized

Do you know anyone who works at a bank?
Not anymore

Do you know anyone who is HIV+?
I do not.

Are you behind on your rent?
Nope.

What is your sexual orientation?
Mostly Straight

What is your favorite brand of hairspray?
I don’t use hairspray; I prefer pomade or gel

Have you had any best friends or SOs who are a different race than you?
Part Japanese, Part Korean, Part Vietnamese… but that’s about it

Have you ever been on TV?
Several times as a kid

What are a few of your favorite things?
Warm blankets, long afternoons for gaming and drinking, truly open and honest sexual conversations

Are you Catholic?
Nope

Are you German?
I am. About 25%

Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior?
I have, a few times.

Have you ever been to a desert?
Yeah, I have family in Arizona

If you could ask Jesus for anything, what would it be?
I ask Jesus for a lot but don’t see a lot going on

Are you engaged?
Not presently

Who did you lose your virginity to?
My wife, Martha

Do you know any trans* people?
I know many. Transition Girl to Boy; Transition Boy to Girl; and Gender Fluid Non Binary

What is your favorite kind of plant?
Privacy Hedge

Do you like your dentist?
My old one, sure

Have you ever donated blood?
No, but I probably should someday

What is your favorite Beatles song?
Elanore Rigby

Who do you know that’s gone off to war?
Both of my grandfather’s did and my brother did when he was in the Navy.

Have you ever been in a protest?
Several

What is your favorite ABBA song?
Take a Chance

Have you ever been to Greece?
No, but I had friends go that raved about it

Do you know your biological father?
I do

Are you French?
Not even a little bit

Do you know anyone who has committed suicide?
Tragically, several people

What is the poorest you have ever been?
When I was in Omaha after law school before I could get any law jobs

Would you want to go to college in-state or out of state?
I went to college in-state at the least popular college in the state.

If you can give your parents one thing in the world, what would it be?
Peace and comfort

If you won the lottery, how would you choose to spend your money?
That entirely depends on the breakdown but, I’d have to guess something like
10% for immediate taxes, bills, pay offs, etc.
40% to investments, savings, and interest accruing accounts.
25% to any “big ticket” purchases like car, house, etc.
25% for Rainy Day Emergency Funds

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be?
I’d let go of the expectations around me; live because life is worth living, not live because You Have a Responsibility

What career path do you see yourself taking in the future?
Attorney until I’m not one. Then maybe judge or author or teacher

If you could have dinner with anyone dead or alive, who would it be?
Fred Rogers

If you could travel back in time to any historical event, which would it be?
Stock Market Crash of 1929

What one book changed your life?
I own it and can’t remember the title but it was a book about the modern Native American treatment in South Dakota and how the Native American culture, community, and rights are really shit on still to this day

How do you prefer to be comforted when you’re upset?
This is a varied thing. Typically give me compliments, alcohol, and a beautiful woman saying very nice things to me or flirting heavily. That’s a fairly good catch all.

What’s the first thing you notice when you meet a person?
Eyes, smile, and demeanor simultaneously

Who would you trade places with someone for a day and why?
Okay first of all “who would you trade places with someone” is terrible grammar. I would trade places with some jet setting Dubai trust fund brat. Set the original me up with a small trust fund of his own and try to do some good in the world

If you could be any object, which would you be and why?
A candle in a romantic restaurant. There’d be good times, bad times, you’d hear or be a part of interesting stories, and you’d have a short life

Are you on the toilet right now?
No. I’m at my desk at work.

If you could revive fashion trends from one particular decade, which would it be?
The 1940s

If you won the lottery, what luxury item would you splurge on?
I’d renovate the house. Redo the whole thing top to bottom and the entire yard. Really make it mine.

If you could have a celeb as your BFF, who would it be?
Jason Segel. He’s actually smarter and more interesting than a lot of people give him credit for! If we’re dreaming bigger, Keanu Reeves.

If you could only eat pizza, wings or burgers for the rest of your life, which would you choose?
Pizza, provided I didn’t have to worry about caloric death

How would you describe your personal clothing style?
“Office Drone”

What’s your favorite song right now?
Megatisune

Where do you like to go shopping?
Places with Board Games, Video Games, or Comic Books

What’s your favorite movie?
I love so many movies. But I haven’t seen anything that really GRABBED me in a long time

What’s your favorite TV show of all time?
Stein’s Gate if anime counts..... The Good Place if not.

Who’s your ultimate celeb crush?
Kloe Kane, fight me

What’s your favorite thing to do alone?
Zone out to a video game for a few hours

What’s your favorite dessert?
Bananas Foster

What’s your biggest fear?
That Martha is the best I’ll ever get and the last I’ll ever have

What part of your childhood are you most nostalgic for?
The idea that life was ahead of me

What do you think is your biggest accomplishment?
I think finishing law school is pretty big.

Is there anything you’re really stressed out about right now?
Life in general

What was the last thing that made you cry?
Driving home from work last night