Feeling Bi/etter in meh...

So today I feel a bit better about my situation. I really do believe it was the hormones from my period.

I was in church and I cried it out and left it all on the “alter”. I even got set off a couple of times at church even though I was able to reign it in. One thing I’m not is my little sister. I can sing, but I’m not built for performance. I’m not trying to stand out by any means. I leave that to those who want to. When I sing, I’m a solo act or I’m a support, but I don’t lead. So it bothers me when people try to force my hand. My sister Tippy has a brash way and she doesn’t really care. As long as the vision of the parents is met, she does not care. She couldn’t hear me on the mic but I could hear me. She came over and made me trade mics with someone and she, in her overarching scheme to do something, can put herself in the middle and mess stuff up and it’s like I want to yell at her to chill out. It’s still a lot of confusion going on right now, but all is getting better.

On the way to work, I didn’t yell at people as much nor did I call them by various cuss words as much as I have been for the past few weeks. I was dealing with a lot of emotion, and lonely stuff. But also I know that old things will have to be removed from my life. Old ways. If I’m supposed to be about this Christ centered life, I can’t be concerned how anyone sees me. I have to become more studious of the word. It’s not a chore. There is a song that has been resonating with me and my stepmother played it yesterday in her office and I just posted it on Facebook. Here: Whatever is in His way, just move it aside.

I decide that I’m not going to think about Him right now and I see his aunt at a function where they were honoring my dad. Then I take a picture of myself this morning and put it on Instagram and he replies about it in my inbox ::rawr::. I respond by saying I saw his aunt. It was either that or not respond and I probably shouldn’t have responded.

That’s all I have right now.
Take care, be love and be loved.

Kindest regards,
Sister