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Surrounded by people. But still feeling alone. Lots of friends, But nobody that really understands. Maybe nobody can. People push their way into my life, Insistant on talking. But they cant under...

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I’m doing just fine. No real problems. Should have a new job soon. Thats good. And yet… It would feel so good to have someone holding me right now. Feeling lonely. Feeling tired. No motivation to...

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God likes new things. He says this. So why would he seek firmly to repeat the past? Especially one which is riddled with human error. Jacob was not supposed to have two wives. He could not be sat...

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I came to a very troublesome realisation today. People are reacting very badly to any sign of God at all. It is not just the rosary around my neck. I pull out a Bible or mention God or praying at...

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I saw you today. You didn’t talk to me. Didn’t look me in the eye. You seemed upset by my being around. I kept my distance. Your girlfriend seemed upset by my too. I saw you and her cuddling and ...

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A wave of unexpected emotions. I feel a sense of panic and urgency but I’m not sure why. Am I just nervous about going to a show tomorrow? It’s not a big one. I’m not even performing of course. T...

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It’s 5am. I’ve been awakw all night thinking of all the things I’ve done or said to hurt you. Thinking of how I will ever make them up to you. Wishing I had understood you then. I thought you wer...

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I had a pretty good day yesterday. I was productive and got alot done. Today I skipped church and took my son to the park. He is being so defiant lately that I don’t know what to do! I want my li...

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I am so lonely. :( I’m sad. I need a backrub amd lots of cuddles. But who knows how long it will be until I can have those things. It doesn’t help that I can’t stop thinking about you. It’s getti...

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It’s funny. I got so used to her standing behind you all the time and her dropping in to talk to me that I miss her now that she’s gone. I figure, that year, I got to know her almost as well as y...

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I’m trying so hard to make something of my writing career. I’m failing so hard too. I meed to pick a project and stick to it so I can move forward instead of bouncing around like a mental pinball...

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I wanted you to follow God with me, and maybe someday you will; right now it seems that you are busy following your own self interests. I still wonder if you were lieing about what God said to yo...

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This crush is riddiculous. Try to remember the sort of man you’ve fallen for! I remember hiding from you in the ladies room between classes so you couldn’t follow me. I’d wait there until I was ...

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It was a bad day today. Woke up angry and discouraged. My writing career isn’t going well and I can’t get motivated to get anything done. Forgot my rosary today. A good friend who is like a broth...

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My thoughts keep circling around. (How crazy am I?) It makes me dizzy. (Want me to hold your books?) The same thoughts everyday. (He really cares about you.) At the center-you. (How was your summ...

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Went to my besties baby shower today. I was sad and jealous almost the entire time, but hopefully I managed to be personable. I didn’t cry anyway. Suddenly I came to the realization that I’m not ...

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Do you know what the devil sounds like? His voice sounds like your own, or mine. But the things he says are things you never would have thought. I heard him once. Tell me what venture would be wo...

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I’m feeling really disconnected right now. I’m not sure why. I’m going to a show at the Black Sheep tonight, but it isn’t your show. I know I will find myself looking around for you anyway. I hop...

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I want hugs! All the hugs! Not only am I gonna hug you but also your girlfriend and your girlfriend’s girlfriend and also maybe your dog. Why? Because I require oxytocin. Also I love hugs. And if...

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Bought a book on demon hunting. They’ve hunted me long enough. I decided maybe I should hunt them for a change. It’s a bit scary. I will only run into two types of possesed people. Those who are ...

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Feeling very sad and lonely lately… Again. It’s like there’s a feeling of being disconnected from the world. Even while I’m surrounded by friends I feel alone. I feel different. I feel like there...

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I finished reading the book of Mark today. Although I was intrigued by the differences in narrative between the two gospels I’ve (re)read so far, I’m excited to be done with them so that I can ju...

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Well, the last diary site I used was deleting parts of entries and allowed very little customization so I’ve downloaded what I could save and I’m starting fresh here. It’s important to me to keep...

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