Miss Chiffs Manager ⋅ 36 ⋅
Wife / Mom! / Biodynamic Urban Farmer / Nutrition Science Buff / Ultra Frugal (Cheap!) Lifestylist / Avid Reader / Writer Extraordinaire / In Pursuit of Moral, Physical, and Intellectual Excellence.
If you do not possess a deep capacity for Anger, your Compassion or so-called Gentleness means nothing to me.
Entries 444
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Why do I do this in Journal
to myself? I must believe, at some level, that I deserve to be subjected to sadistic, controlling, mean, angry, abusive men. My behavior is the evidence. We can choose to do bad things, but we ...
I get annoyed when I make a case, and he continues on as if i never said anything. And i say… look. You can either respond to what i just said or disagree. But don’t pretend that I didn’t say an...
It's not mine in Journal
Not my decision. It’s not my decision to make. I had the thought. And then, like I was slipping into a warm bath, my body began to relax. It’s true, I realized. It’s not my decision. I feel fr...
Feeling kind of in Journal
Sick. I feel like my life is being narrated by Lloyd deMauss’s historical psychology texts. Virtue is knowledge plus courage Well. Ill tell you what. It sure takes courage to dig up some of this...
Perhaps the Connection in Journal
was not as straight forward in my earlier post as I would have liked. I do try to simplify and take things step by step. That one was a leap. But, I don’t feel like redoing it. My mom’s most rece...
The State as Family in Journal
I don’t think that it is any coincidence that we have the gov’t and the leaders that we have, considering the state of parenting and the family. If we accept the copious evidence that the vast m...
Reflections in Journal
What do you do when your needs are met? What kind of pursuits would you have if you didn’t need anything at all? I think that I am beginning to see the glimmers of an answer in my son. His answ...
I’ve read a lot about emotional intelligence, nonviolent communication, human needs in communication, psychology, therapy, virtue, philosophy, and secular ethics. People need acknowledgement- be...
I Admit in A Childhood Lost
I do keep checking the Spam folder to see if my mom emailed me again. I don’t even recall what day it was, if it was still March or early April, that I saw that mom had emailed again and I just ...
People Get Angry in Journal
when I start asking questions about their relationships. People who get angry at questions about themselves are terrified. They know that they are not worth loving if the definition of love is ...
Of Course you were perfect. Of course you were born with the ability to love, and be loved. Of course you are naturally compassionate, kind, empirical and reciprocal. Of course you are not innat...
Life is Funny in Journal
DH has been resisting my insistence on doing therapy. He can’t seem to criticize anyone except himself. He doesn’t see the benefit in doing therapy or putting in the work. Trying to feel his feel...
Do you have a BTC Buddy? in Journal
Something that was brought up in my group of frankly stone geniuses, was that no matter how dedicated you are to your plan, if you don’t have a buddy, you’re going to be far more swayed by the em...
Have a Plan in Journal
and Stick to It It’s funny how human emotion is the largest influence on finances. Not sensible planning or an eye to the long term outcome. Just in the moment panic or greed. BTC went on sale d...
The Cruelty of Free Will in A Childhood Lost
My relationship with Free Will has always been one of mistrust or perhaps disbelief. My middle school counselor told me “I really thought you were lying. I’m not sure why.” I didn’t respond, but...
Trust in A Childhood Lost
My son is asleep still and the house is quiet. The neighbor is mowing and the the dryer is going- a load of diapers. My life is rhythmical and serene. I flow with the seasons; my will is graceful...
The Beginning of in Journal
loneliness. And God, am I ever so lonely. I peered at the pictures of “us” that I had hung around our small cottage like house. I looked for the people in them- first at the sibling pictures. T...
BTC is up and we made a shit ton of money. Ofc we aren’t going to touch it for at least 5 years. Should shoot up even more, as the dollar collapses. I just hope the economy will be viable in the ...
Fucking poison I’m surrounded by people who want nothing good for me. Well. I have 1 friend. One. And she’s busy with a newborn. Fucking HATE people who want to give marital advice with no self...
doing? What do I care about? Niceties? Politeness? Being civil? Making sure I don’t hurt anyone feelings? All the while I get pummeled and castigated, ignored, spurned, taken for granted? No....
I may Actually have in Journal
underestimated how upset I made my aunt by pointing out the fact that she’s old. I think that I really hit a nerve when I told her that, while her opinions of me were valid, I didn’t see any part...
Yeah, yeah. MIL’s are always bitchy. Mine is… not really bitchy. At least, not in any way that you could tell off the bat. She’s pretty mild, passionless, passive. Long story. I have had a beef...
What can I have pride in? I find myself feeling rather proud when I formulate a rational opinion with evidence and reasoning. And, even more so when soundly rebutting criticism. Okay; I can make...
is up again. I’ve been buying DCA and it has helped to assuage my anxiety about buying. But now it’s up quite a bit and idk what to do. Still have quite a bit more to drop. Probably should just ...
I bought pens... in Journal
And why is this important, I hear you ask? Well. I love to write. Like. Absolutely love it. Pen on paper, the smooth silky line of ink left cleanly on a white paper. Unlined paper, of course, bu...
