SecretsandLies ⋅ 28 ⋅

I don't know who I am

That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt.

John Green

Entries 84

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January 05, 2016

Sudden in Depression

I know it’s been a while, I haven’t really wanted to write anything. But something just happened and I needed to write all of a sudden. Earlier on today, my college class and I were talking about...


November 03, 2015

3/11/15 in Depression

I’m very tired of living


November 03, 2015

Pissed off in Depression

I’m sick of being a really good friend, and being kind and understanding in situations that disappoint me or make me sad, when if it’s the other way around she’s no where near as understanding an...


November 02, 2015

Bad again in Depression

So it has been a while since I’ve written here. It’s been kind of awful but good at the same time. College had been going well for a while but over the last two weeks my brain has gotten worse an...


August 31, 2015

Emotional rant in Depression

I don’t want to let this beat me but it’s wearing me out. There are so many things that I’d love to do in life, for instance I’d love to start vlogging on YouTube about beauty and life in general...


August 29, 2015

Im alive in Depression

So, it’s been quite a while. Just really updating to say I am alive, don’t worry. I’m okay, I’m doing a bit better. I just haven’t felt like writing at all. Prefer to draw really


June 21, 2015

Lost phone in Depression

I feel so stupid for losing my phone. Ever since I lost it I’ve been feeling horrible. My phone is like my child, like it’s so damn important to me. My life is on that thing. Plus I can’t even ca...


June 17, 2015

Update in Depression

I was doing good for about 2 weeks and now I’m back to rock bottom. Don’t want to get out of bed, don’t want to leave the house, don’t want to get dressed, see people, do anything. Everyone’s irr...


May 27, 2015

therapy in Depression

I have to go to my 2nd counselling session tomorrow ( well second with this person) and the thought of it is making me extremely depressed and anxious. I really don’t want to have to talk to this...


May 25, 2015

breakup in Depression

Breaking up with someone who’s madly in love with you is so difficult


May 22, 2015

mistake in Depression

Oh god what the fuck did I just do


May 13, 2015

what is love in Depression

I’m not in love. I should be, I thought I was, I know how I should feel and I thought I felt it but I’ve just been thinking lately that this is definitely not love. I love him, that’s true, but I...


May 11, 2015

self {poem} in Depression

I’m crumbling into pieces and no one seems to notice I’m falling apart and no one will put me back together I’m drowning but no one will lift me out of the water The only one who can help me is m...


May 05, 2015

. in Depression

I’m so tired of constantly hating myself. It’s exhausting. I just want to be slim. That’s literally all I want.


April 28, 2015

bad in Depression

Bad day. Very bad day. I just want it all to be over


April 24, 2015

not invited in Depression

Do you ever feel so isolated, that even your efforts to come out of isolation cause you to become more isolated? Does that even make sense? A college friend - whom I thought was quite a good frie...


April 20, 2015

nothingness in Depression

I’m so tired of this life. Day after day after day. The same constant worries which consume me. The horrible self hate. Wanting to sleep the days away. I’m sick of it. I’ve just had enough


April 17, 2015

2:30am thoughts in Depression

Do you ever have thoughts that you’re afraid to think? Like oh shit no I can’t think that or it might be true. Right now, at 2:27am, I am worrying about seeing my boyfriend tomorrow. I am wonder...


April 15, 2015

sex talk in Depression

Okay so I haven’t seen my boyfriend in a few weeks because he went home to his parents over easter and that’s too far away for me to get to. I’m seeing him on friday and we’re just hanging in his...


April 15, 2015

life in Depression

Since college started I’ve been feeling ljke I’m not very important to my best friend. Since she got these new friends it feels kind of disposable to her. Almost like she knows I’m not going to l...


April 13, 2015

new start in Depression

Alright so I bought an eBook to help with weight loss. Finally did something productive. It’s actually really good and I think I’m going to be able to do this. Fuck that I definitely will be able...


April 07, 2015

sex in Depression

Sex makes me very nervous. Partially because I hate my body, that’s a big deal for me. But also because of my lack of experience. I may have had sex before, but I haven’t touched a guy properly. ...


April 04, 2015

friends in Depression

Kind of sick of my best friend at the moment. She’s been a lot meaner lately. It’s almost as if since she got a new boyfriend she’s decided she doesn’t really need me so she can be as mean as she...


April 04, 2015

tiny entry in Depression

I’m lonely. There are so many people around me who love me and talk to me and yet I’m lonely. I’m exhausted all the time. I’m so sick of this


March 21, 2015

*hugs* in Depression

I don’t think you all realise how much your words mean to me. I wish I could hug all of you. When I first starting writing here, I thought I was just keeping a diary. But it’s really nice to see ...


Books 2


82 Entries
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2 Entries
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