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'ugh. i'm so tired to-day. so foggytired. [i realise that's redundant]. i was walking back from the store and everything.........everything was far away. i didn't connect. i couldn't feel anythin...

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'Part D: i don't want to be 'everyone'./and sick again. and why do i want to set myself apart?/ i'm too inwardly focused i have been for yrs.   So, sometimes I'll do/say something - such as withi...

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'yeah. you're tellin me. SA/ED Content So. tonight's ep. of 'glee' was really. relevant. You know cause uh. Finn was wondering how to get his youth back. yeah. i get that. damn i get that. When y...

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'when i think of home i think of a place where there's love overflowing - from. The Wiz.   well yeah. that too. And. 'home isn't a place: it's a feeling". uh huh that too. [which, again. is why i...

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'orgasms/sad when i look at the world     So. as put. sex life is lacking bc of back pain. You know. Back a few wks. ago, when James & I were in bed [and, to clarify. when i put that i don't ...

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'how i'm doing physically/not a pill popper. its cold out. or looks so. and cloudy. I don't feel good. currently 5:20 p.m. watchin 'friends'. i'm quesy and tired. and you know that achy feeling r...

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'ok so this is a bit of a repeat entry. '' No. not 'i guess'. i am. So..............................sososo................last night when James was driving home from work he'd picked a friend up....

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I've been thinking about this a lot lately. it's been almost 2 yrs. since I was last sexually abused. I don't remember a whole helluva lot about that night. it was dec. 22nd, 20.......... [um we...

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'>.......understand. 'you need to be ok w/ that', what to say/not say. what helps/doesn't. and the dream being not 'just a dream'. So. I don't understand this but have a guess. For the past......

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'Sorry I had to break that entry into 4, but it screws up when I try and copy & paste something from online, so. and then once I've done that it won't let me type more, so.   Anyway.   I had ...

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'and. [here's] what scares me the most.   So, obviously I've been researching this quite a bit. All I have for the cause is that there's a genetic component and it can can be linked to birth comp...

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'>.......but come to find out. It is. You know, back in high school, yeah I had depression/anxiety [ok so also this disorder, but, as already detailed, didn't register it], but at the time it ...

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'i'm not. you know. As mentioned, I'm having a really hard time accepting this. I'm in shock I guess. And quite obviously very upset. This isn't me I'm not. partially schizophrenic. No I'm a fair...

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'>...........night was good untill it. wasn't. untill it turned awful. and PTSD. and advice/meds/natural stuff vs. not. and. not touching. and. latest development. ____________________________...

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'constantly drugged. as put. It's like when I was 18 the summer I turned 19. bc back then the Night Terrors kept me up every night. And I'd go to sleep when the sun came up. And wake up.............

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'>..........change. for anyone. they have to change for me. after a fight = freedom.   oh god. So, James & I have had...........  2 fights within the past. few hrs. One thing I really don'...

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'So, I've been thinking. And. About. ok so jumping subjects here. I've been too damn tired to think rationally logically. It's not even that I'm upset about some of his smaller advice/ideas. it's...

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'i've become comfortably numb - pink floyd A Very Honest Entry. I've been this way for a few yrs now. I've just never admitted it to anyone bc I've been too afraid to really admit it. and the fac...

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'>.......too close.   So tonight's ep. was about abuse. Well, physical abuse. And it of course reminded me of me and what I'd gone through. the 1st time. W/ all the guilt and the..........want...

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'myself really feel. I've exhausted every possible option. I'm always looking for an out a fight. W/ him. And I don't even know why. I'll say something and he'll ask what and I'll go 'nothing' or...

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'http://www.opendiary.com/entryview.asp?authorcode=D668086&entry=13837Ok um. I need to be completely honest here. This is what's really been going on. I love him. We just surpassed our 5 mont...

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'I don't want to have that moment w/ him. You know the one. where couples on tv that have broken up go 'here's your stuff' back and they give each other the box. I don't want this to be any harde...

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'exactly like jacob/what would i want someone to tell me. Ok, so. As put. I don't think I can deal w/ being in a relationship right now, w/ this other stuff coming up. By which I mean in well a b...

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'We're still together. I phoned him and told him and we talked about it. Which to be honest I didn't really want to do. I was thinking, I'd phone him, leave a voicemail and that would be it. Mayb...

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'Currently: 11:40 p.m. I woke up at 8:50 p.m. last night [Sun.] and then went back to sleep at 1 this afternoon and woke up at 8:40 p.m. I had a scary dream. [which i'll get to later along w/ ano...

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