Antiangel ⋅ 40 ⋅
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20 years in 2024... the year of big changes
This year it’s hitting me really hard. The loss of my grandma. It’s been 20 years next month. She was more a mom to be than a grandma. I miss her. My love’s wife has a brain tumor (what took my ...
Nothin new to see here in 2024... the year of big changes
I don’t write much. I don’t really have much to talk about. I finished school. Managed a 4.0 through it all. Considering it was only a year it wasn’t that big of a deal. My last class didn’t aff...
Feelings in 2024... the year of big changes
After 4 months I finally gave him his Christmas/Birthday gift. He said he loved it. He had been wanting that for a while but never bought it. I guess I kinda knew him only a month and a half to t...
Maybe... and not in My descent
The week of Thanksgiving we were slow at work, hell we’re still slow. But anyway. The Tuesday before Thanksgiving I left work early as it was my youngest daughter’s birthday. I picked both kids u...
Memories in 2023 the year I recover
While on my walk today I was thinking about some memories. Not very many. Some may be a little tmi, so be aware. A few months ago when I was deep within the thralls of the ex boyfriend we were ou...
Thoughts of 10/28 in My descent
Ok, this is going to be a long one. Maybe boring but I had to get it out. Reflecting on my past relationships. A lot of it is eww. Like bad bad relationships. First boyfriend, I was only 14 (I th...
Closing that door in 2023 the year I recover
I wasn’t going to do it. I wanted to stay friends but I can’t. Not anymore. I decided to be nice and call him back on Saturday. He never answered. I told him I will not be contacting him again un...
Breathe... in 2023 the year I recover
Anxiety is a bitch. My anxiety is high right now. I just want to cry. I’m going to see one of my best friends and their family. She just had a baby Tuesday. This will be a 6.5 hour drive at the ...
Things I tell myself in 2023 the year I recover
I have stuff I want to say. I do not know exactly how to say it, or what exactly it is I want to say. I think I am ready to be back to work already. Sometimes weekends are a little too long.
Progression in 2023 the year I recover
As I think about this I realize a project I started the other night that I need to finish. Progress though. I have been deleting my pictures of the ex, or more like moving them to my computer so ...
Took it a little far in 2023 the year I recover
So the other day I was upset with the kids for not helping to clean the house. Okay, I was mad and yelling. My oldest (she’s 15) pops off with I don’t do anything to keep the house clean. That ma...
It is what I need in 2023 the year I recover
But is it what I really want? I think things with that guy are over now. Which isn’t a bad thing. Actually, it’s a great thing. But I still feel sad it didn’t work. I still love him. Oh I love hi...
Hope for change in 2023 the year I recover
As this year has gone I talk about doing things for a little bit and then act. I did it with school. I think I talked, quietly, about it for a month. Took the step to look into it and answered th...
8 months into the year and have I recovered yet? in 2023 the year I recover
I was doing so well at recovering from the year and some odd months with him. We would talk once in a while. We would spend time together too. Then we got back together. But it wasn’t the right t...
In the feels in 2023 the year I recover
The last couple days I’ve been in a mood. Maybe it’s the time of year. I’ve never really thought this month was a hard month for me, but maybe it is. There is only one negative thing I can for su...
Fun times fun times in 2023 the year I recover
Last night was the first concert of at least 5 for the year. My oldest and I went to Rockzilla. We both enjoyed it. My brother and his wife were there also but not seated next to us. We found eac...
A little light comparison in A new start
I wanted to write about the differences from my friend and my husband. But there is no comparison. I feel like my friend knows me way better than my ex does and we haven’t known each other as lon...
Ugh ugh ugh in A new start
We have had no power since Friday. No heat. Barely any cell service. It’s going great here! At least we aren’t snowed in.
Everyone else is doing it in A new start
General What kind of house do you live in (condo, single-family, apartment, craftsman, ranch, etc.)? manufactured home What kind of siding does it have? t whatever it’s called When was it built? ...
The picture in my head in A new start
Before I get to what I want to write about there is something that sort of bugs me. I had a friend I was talking to for a little while. We got along well. Both of us would admit that. I was told ...
What sings to me right now in A new start
Ok, I thought this was going to be easy, but NOPE! The first who knows how mand songs are Saving Abel Those Who Wait When the sun goes down and the lights all fade There’s no one else around to t...
because I can in A new start
a survey stollen from .eve. because I can and because I don’t want to write about the past again right now. But I will have another entry somewhat soon, a real one and a memory one. Was your last...
The past it haunts in Stories of the past
I was talking to someone and decided maybe I should write about some of my past experiences. Be aware a lot of them are sexual. Such is my life. I have many stories regarding where I worked for 1...
Just when you need it in A new start
Every now and then you meet someone just when you need it. They do something for you. Not even in a sexual way. They make you laugh. They make you smile. Ok, it would have been fabulous to meet 6...
a survey, and maybe a little more in A new start
What does your online diary name mean, and why did you pick it? it was a reversal of an email address I had, instead of angel I was antiangel When did you first get an online diary? started with ...
