Her ⋅ 49 ⋅
I'm a previous OpenDiary subscriber. I bet most of you are too. I'm a Diagnostic Medical Sonographer (I do ultrasounds) I have 1 daughter (Lily) 1 Dog (Callie) 1 cat (Sophie) And 'C' is Lily's father.
1. Go Sky Diving 2. Ride a horse 3. Get Married. 4. Have children and have my brother be able to meet them 5. Write a book 6. Publish a book 7. Own a house 7.5 Own a BIGGER house 8. Travel through the mountains 9. Learn to Play Solfeggietto on the pi
Entries 454
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Sorry, Prosebox. We Were Just Friends in Out in the Open
I like Prosebox. I mean, why wouldn’t I? It was there when I needed it most. It’s reliability was well, reliable. However, that’s where it started, and ended with me. I never loved it. So al...
Seriously Thinking About Going Back To OD in Out in the Open
That’s all I have to say. Life is good. (you can tell because there aren’t a lot of entries lately) I just really never felt this place like I did OpenDiary. So yeah, not sure, but I think I w...
Everything Changes in Out in the Open
That’s the song I am listening to right now. It’s from the musical The Waitress. The phone call I received yesterday was not from K. Not going to lie, I’m a bit disappointed about it. However,...
Day 3 in Out in the Open
Today was much easier. I worked though, so it kept my mind off of him. Someone called me from a number I didn’t recognize. I was playing a game on my phone so my first reaction was to cancel t...
It Hasn't Even Been 48 Hours Yet in Out in the Open
Here’s the thing about K. There is one thing he does incredibly well, and that is hide from me. It doesn’t bother him to go days with out talking to me. Sometimes he’ll go a week. Doesn’t hav...
Goodbye Love in Out in the Open
I am grieving losing you. Inside my head I am repeatedly thinking about you. I can’t get you out of my mind. However, I know it’s going to get easier. I walked away from you before. It took ...
The Play in Out in the Open
When I started this play I was absolutely thrilled in all ways for so many reasons. I was nervous because I went out of my comfort zone and sang in front of a room full of strangers. I hadn’t re...
The Death of My Father in Out in the Open
The same dishes lay sitting on the counter that were there 9 days ago. They haven’t moved. There are 7 vases of flowers sitting around my house slowly decaying. A bookbag sits next to the livi...
The Play, Day 3 and 4 in Out in the Open
I am losing my voice. I am feeling panicked. I feel a bit overwhelmed. There is so much to learn and luckily I know most of the words, but unfortunately, I don’t know most of the notes. I am ...
Day 2, The Play in Out in the Open
Oh my gosh was practice fun today! They assigned me top soprano which is what I used to be and I was a little hesitant at first, but the more I sang the more confident I became. It’s a whole wor...
Day 1, The Play in Out in the Open
It’s been 21 years since I was in my high school choir. I was in the performance choir where we would go around performing for various audiences. It was considered the “highest” choir in the sc...
Just a Long Over Due Update in Out in the Open
It’s 2017 and I just read through many of these entries. I am light years ahead in so many things compared to back then. I have a great job. I have great friends. I feel so happy inside most ...
Finally, It's Out in the Open in Out in the Open
All last month C was asking me to move in with him. He’s asked me before but I always politely declined. I had absolutely no desire to move in with him. I liked my space, my own home, being cl...
Learning more in Out in the Open
Stayed up until almost 2am with my exchange student. We talked for so long about everything. She’s so smart, kind, and beautiful. She’s teaching lily and me so much. This is an amazing experienc...
Exchange Student in Out in the Open
So I decided that I would invite an exchange student into my home. She got here on Thursday night. She’s 17 years old and she’s from Italy. She will be attending the school here. She is doing h...
You Again in Out in the Open
I worry about you. Way more than I probably need to. But I do. I know you aren’t strong all the time. You try to be, but you fail. We all do. But when you fail you go much lower than most people....
C in Out in the Open
There are times that your love feels real. You called me “your girl” last night. I reread that text a million times. Each time my heart fluttered like a school girl about to get her first kiss. ...
Don't Ever Leave Me Again in Out in the Open
You stopped talking to me like we had no past, no history. It was as though I was just something ok to just throw away. Yes, I told you I couldn’t do it anymore. I didn’t have the strength to ...
Panis Angelicus in Out in the Open
This happens way too often. This feeling that I love you. This hope that you might just love me back. The way you sometimes look at me and treat me makes me feel special and loved. It’s just a...
Substitute Teaching in Out in the Open
Yesterday in the class I subbed for something wonderful happened. I handed an assignment out and one child pushed the paper back and said, “oh, I can’t do this kind of stuff.” I quickly smiled a...
Took Me 3 attempts to Remember This Sites Name in Out in the Open
So much has happened. Why? Because life just keeps moving no matter if you type in Prosebox or not. Which I wish I would have wrote it down, but alas, I did not. First of all my 6 year old da...
I Am Not Strong Enough in Out in the Open
I thought I was strong enough to accept C’s son. I am not. Lily met him last night and I fell apart. I was a complete mess. I hate C for that child. Not because he had sex with another woman...
No News is Good News in Out in the Open
I haven't been here in awhile. I am working a lot. And when I'm not working I am with Lily playing. I have been on some dating sites. Not really been a positive experience. Been kind of awf...
His Go-To Threat in Out in the Open
So C has made it clear, multiple times that he will not provide her a sibling. Then he hints that maybe he will, but then he changes his mind again just so he can tell me no again. I have had e...
There Are Some Bad Days in Out in the Open
My life has been so good as of late. However, occasionally I still fall into a bit of a funk. C has told me no as a final decision on having another child. I have NOT been taking this well. I ...
