The Wonderland Years: 2012: 1/2 done
by nothispenelope
Entries 186
Page 1 of 8
march 30, 2010
'Currentlly: knackered, drained Current Time: 1:35 a.m. Currently Spinning: Adele, 21 omygod. things have been so. insane lately. On Wed. just as I was going to the store early that afternoon J...
april 3, 2012
'today's not going much better [and]. not that yesterday was [all that] great [either]. So, it snowed. overnight, apparently. i crashed between 7 and 8 last night and was mostly asleep when James...
april 3, 2012
'and now for Part 4. the last part. Part 4. cooking. So as we all know I don't cook. I mean I can I just. don't. and ya know what? i'm really ok w/ that. I don't really want to either. I've sur...
april 4, 2012*
'why i'm so opposed to this/people overload/anorexia. So, apparently.This Sat., James, Max, Jasmine [who apparently is Mexican] and I are going to see The Lorax. When James [he was quite drunk at...
april 10, 2012
''this morning being yesterday a.m. v. early. *Lou's wife being Sara 'so. i'm confused. i'm in recovery again. This morning when James had pizza he handed some to me and was like 'here. eat'. ...
april 10, 2012
'>......exit. relapse. love. grandmother. Warning: Fairly Worrisome No Advice again. copied from an email and edited: 'So, on the one hand, I want to leave him. bc upon thinking about it.......
april 10, 2012
'fuk. i'm worried about us. [ok so slight off note, but.........i'd get blazed, which helps. although it's sunny out and i never get blazed when it's sunny. nor do i drink when it's sunny. or cut...
april 10, 2012
'so earlier today [currently 6:40 p.m.] he phones. we talk. he told me to please not do that to him and/or to do it as little as possible. oh 'that' being uh....................................no...
april 10, 2012*
'well. more of the symptoms are presenting themselves 3 more. 8........er, '8'. wow...........and that has nothing to do w/ this entry. [i'm blazed right now]..............wow.just.wow. Currently...
april 11, 2012*
'>........i've gotten. No Advice and. popsicles, incense & smoothies. & fevers warmth reactions. so. Currently: 10:50 p.m. As put. I'm finally starting to see how sick I've g...
april 11, 2011
'ok so I know I wrote part of this earlier this a.m. and then evidently crashed from 4 - 8:55 a.m. so didn't finish the entry. so a bit of a repeat.entry. ' ........but that's. not good. [so, obv...
april 12, 2012
'Ok onto Part C Part C: Communication/right up front instead of waiting I'm not the greatest w/ communication. In fact that's how I communicate. is I don't. I'm an avoider. a runner. an escapis...
april 15, 2012
'Part B: the lesser of 2 evils/all or nothing ok, so. It's always been an all-or-nothing deal. I either eat and deal w/ emotional shit or I............don't eat and don't. It's either complete ph...
april 16, 2012
'selfishness. 14: no sick w/ parents, 16: cooking/pots/knives Part A: it's so frustrating. he doesn't get it. not as much as I want him to [yes well does anyone. i'm making a point not asking...
april 16, 2012
'ugh. i'm so tired to-day. so foggytired. [i realise that's redundant]. i was walking back from the store and everything.........everything was far away. i didn't connect. i couldn't feel anythin...
april 17, 2012*
'Part D: i don't want to be 'everyone'./and sick again. and why do i want to set myself apart?/ i'm too inwardly focused i have been for yrs. So, sometimes I'll do/say something - such as withi...
april 17, 2012*
'yeah. you're tellin me. SA/ED Content So. tonight's ep. of 'glee' was really. relevant. You know cause uh. Finn was wondering how to get his youth back. yeah. i get that. damn i get that. When y...
april 18, 2012*
'when i think of home i think of a place where there's love overflowing - from. The Wiz. well yeah. that too. And. 'home isn't a place: it's a feeling". uh huh that too. [which, again. is why i...
april 18, 2012*
'orgasms/sad when i look at the world So. as put. sex life is lacking bc of back pain. You know. Back a few wks. ago, when James & I were in bed [and, to clarify. when i put that i don't ...
april 18, 2012
'how i'm doing physically/not a pill popper. its cold out. or looks so. and cloudy. I don't feel good. currently 5:20 p.m. watchin 'friends'. i'm quesy and tired. and you know that achy feeling r...
april 19, 2012
'ok so this is a bit of a repeat entry. '' No. not 'i guess'. i am. So..............................sososo................last night when James was driving home from work he'd picked a friend up....
april 25, 2012
'>.......understand. 'you need to be ok w/ that', what to say/not say. what helps/doesn't. and the dream being not 'just a dream'. So. I don't understand this but have a guess. For the past......
april 27, 2012
'Sorry I had to break that entry into 4, but it screws up when I try and copy & paste something from online, so. and then once I've done that it won't let me type more, so. Anyway. I had ...
april 27, 2012
'and. [here's] what scares me the most. So, obviously I've been researching this quite a bit. All I have for the cause is that there's a genetic component and it can can be linked to birth comp...
april 27, 2012
'>.......but come to find out. It is. You know, back in high school, yeah I had depression/anxiety [ok so also this disorder, but, as already detailed, didn't register it], but at the time it ...