Entries 236
Page 4 of 10
i really like that i don't have to try.
no this isn’t about evan. although the last time i wrote an entry like this. it was. so. also i don’t like when people use the word ‘try’. cause they either do or don’t or start to. like there’s ...
shooting star.
so. i saw a shooting star the other night. pretty sure that’s what it was. well. after, i looked it up online and saw photos..........confirming........yep. it was this bright white flash. i have...
from the 10th - the 16th
so. on sun. the 10th. i. did my laundry. mon. - wed. i. didn’t do anything. as usual. um on thurs. i was at my mom’s. oh yeah that’s the day my sister came w/ my mom. to pick me up. my mom i had ...
so. guess what?
[well. i won’t really give anyone a chance to guess.]. anyway. so a couple wks. ago my ex girlfriend. or w/e the hell we were. accepted my fb friend request. lindsey. and it was. extremely flatte...
so. we got a new family attorney.
thank god. cause i did not like laura. when i first met her she was ok. but then she got involved w/ the whole evan/me running away. thing so. [oh yeah when i was uh. 26 i ran away from the place...
just. waiting.
so last wk. my goal. was to not argue w/ her. my sister which i didn’t. i’m not going to fight or argue w/ her. that implies a relationship and getting close which. no and opening up. it’s weird....
so. last wk.
so. last wk. on thurs. when my mom came to pick me up. my sister was also in the car. which i did not know untill. on that morning my mom told me. and i’m just like ‘oh’. like well fuk. i know. i...
and you want to know the really sucky thing?
is that. my sister didn’t even do it. for me. [although that would’ve also bothered me. a great deal bc. again i resent being protected.]. no it just. she. was only thinking of herself, at the ti...
well. it's her loss.
well. it’s her loss. my sister’s. in the last 8 or so yrs. - actually a little over - she’s missed out on getting to know someone who’s. well. she’s missed out on getting to know me. and for thos...
so. the second time my sister was addicted to drugs which was in her early to mid 20’s. she. was addicted to vicodin. alrite. so growing up i just. required more attention then she did through no...
pearl ring. and pot.
so. i’ve mentioned the pearl ring before. well. my sister left her pearl ring at my mom’s. and at first i thought ‘oh i should say something’ but then i’m like. no. after all. the reason my mom b...
it's sad. purple rain.
it’s sad. it is really sad. that now bc i felt. my sister drove a wedge between us 8 yrs. ago. we. don’t have much of a relationship. no and i played a part too. i’m not saying it was entirely he...
you don't want your rights taken away? well.
and not ‘you’ personally the person reading this. anyone. my sister. i felt. violated my privacy by. mentioning the thing between me my ex. when he threatened me. regardless of how. she found out...
it's complicated.
i like that movie. anyway. it’s more complicated then. just ‘oh this store clerk was impolite to me’ or ‘oh i had a problem w/ this. wait staff member at this establishment’ cause. in those 2 exa...
it's bizarre. and i don't understand.
so. a wk. ago when. my sister was over at my parents’. she either said ‘no one did anything about it’ or ‘no one was there for me’.............no actually. i know she said the second one. and tha...
what's love got to do w/ it. and i don't understand.
ya know...........just bc i love. [and i do.]. my sister. doesn’t mean i have to let her in. ever [although ‘ever’ is a long time. it is. a long time.]. like sure. we can all play physical games ...
i told them about olivia.
well fuk. i can’t sleep. [well have you made an effort to? yes. not much but yes.]. although. it’s not that unusual for me to be up for 10, 12+ hrs. so. and it’s now been. 11 hrs. i woke up at um...
from the 3rd - the 9th
on sun. the 3rd i. did my laundry as usual. mon. - wed. i. didn’t do anything. thurs. i um. went to my mom’s via her. we had lunch at her place then um. i went out. my sister came by that day. oh...
so. [and this has nothing to do w/ the dream btw.]. anyway. i used to have this beautiful faded sapphire ring. that my dad gave to me. he’d found it under his mom’s my grandmother’s place. er hou...
right decision. and the pearl ring.
so. is this, the right decision for me? to not trust my sister? no for me personally not anyone else. i think...........no not ‘i think’. no yeah. yeah it is. [and it’d be fine if it wasn’t but y...
threats. and ug.
so. um............the day my now-ex threatened me. ok this was like. 6 yrs. ago or so. we did not. have an argument about sex. contrary to what at least my sister thinks. they think. that we had ...
well. the only thing i can do.
is keep being who i am. yeah actually the last time i saw marty he told me “keep being you.”. er i can’t really change that but thanks? no i’m not over. what my sister did. i’m just fukin tired. ...
trust. green light. she had it comin.
Trust has to be earned. not given. and i think almost anybody would agree w/ me on that. like my sister doesn’t get to waltz into my life again and and...........and fukin apologise and like oh o...
pressure. and revenge.
so. i’ve been reading up on revenge recently. i think i read an article on menshealth. com [yes sometimes i’ve read a few articles on their site. even though i’m a woman] i think that was the sou...
i don't like secrets.
well. i mean not me personally. no uh on sat. my sister said that. and she wants to get to know me...........right yeah ok. so. at one point during the 2 hr. or so conversation on sat. amongst he...
