Entries 32
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It's not being psychic, it's following the energies
Similarly to Z, J left the sort of goodbye message saying he needs to work on himself…that it’s nothing I did to cause it thing. He did so after needing to “process” last night when triggered by...
I did that...
Yeah. I didn’t handle that well at all with all the filling in the blanks that my mind was doing. I left a goodbye message to A. 3 days I thought was enough time to give someone to contact me ba...
Heavy
That’s how the energy feels right now with Mercury Retrograde, days maybe hours before shedding, and before the first quarter moon in my sign. My thoughts went to dark things today like not wanti...
Today
Today is August 6th. Happy wedding anniversary to my best friend. Also, I love you and miss you Timmers. I sought solace at the nearby nature center. 10 turtles, many ducks, a few geese, and a ro...
All or nothing
Z asked to remain distant friends while he sorts out what he wants to do. I guess he doesn’t want “us” and our intimacy to cloud his judgment. Makes sense and I’m okay (at least for now) not seek...
He's leaving
I’m not sure what my previous entry said, but if I asked the universe for clarity…it couldn’t be more clear. Z is moving back to a state to return to a job he loves before the end of the year. He...
Balance
I think I had to see what was blocking my intuition in order to access it. I can’t say it’s fully accessed because hope and fear make it so fuzzy. In a way, I with the tarot reader never would ha...
Possible solutions?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again now and also down the line. I really feel at home in this waning moon energy, almost balsamic. I was born during this phase. I wonder if others tend to f...
Feeling nothing
I don’t remember the last time I cried and really can’t access my emotion. Either this is one low grade dissociative state, continuous and lingering…or I’m hypomanic without the manic part? I fee...
Feeling nothing
I don’t remember the last time I cried and really can’t access my emotion. Either this is one low grade dissociative state, continuous and lingering…or I’m hypomanic without the manic part? I fee...
Insecure
Woke up and some part of me thinks that all is and has been moving too fast. All of it. Since T…and now up until Z. It doesn’t agree and thinks everything could have waited and been more planned ...
M said
M said that what A did could be seen as sexual assault. Maybe. She said I didn’t do anything wrong and told me to block him. I guess a theme is that I only feel comfortable with forming strong em...
That happened
Yesterday I was invited to my guy friends home. The plan was to work on a puzzle together and maybe hang out by the pool at his apartment. I know there was a little flirting here and there, but h...
This is playing out...
Last quarter moon is tomorrow and while I didn’t necessarily have new moon wishes this month, I think I made it pretty clear that moving forward into male friendship/more was clear to the univers...
3 AM...You're on my mind once again...
That’s the song in my head by Mandy Moore. It’s true. Total rumination regarding Z and somehow knowing/WiseMind/intuition entered. I know it’s that because I feel the energy surges and I have lef...
Mama duck
This new community is so loving and supportive, especially with the animals. With the exception of the lady I witnessed running over part of a family of geese, people have been helping the wild l...
It's all wrong
This whole dating/guy friending thing…I’m doing it all wrong. It’s too fast. Z fits nearly everything, but it didn’t feel right. I don’t know if he’s the person I could easily curl up with and f...
The next morning
Feeling sad. Maybe it’s T’s energy. I checked in and don’t really think it’s about guilt. None of my parts are upset. It’s maybe the knowing that I can’t help him and this also won’t go anywhere....
Works on paper...
Thinking of T, part of me has considered having the type of relationship our star charts says we have, which is not main stream. That could have been the lifestyle, but beyond that too…what if fw...
Shifting energy
Maybe it’s because Mercury will be direct tomorrow, but I feel a shift. It feels like things are catching up to match what is here. Thoughts of living there with T seem like an almost distant mem...
New perspective maybe
First of all, I admit that I fantasize about meeting T all over again because of our chemistry. I miss him and censor myself in our conversations. We’ve reduced down to “What’s for dinner?” and t...
New perspective maybe
First of all, I admit that I fantasize about meeting T all over again because of our chemistry. I miss him and censor myself in our conversations. We’ve reduced down to “What’s for dinner?” and t...
Last night
Pizza with T was a typical situation with him behind and forgetting things. But the substance of it was what mattered. Held Evvy. We caught up on our happenings. I was so emotional and I asked hi...
Bobby
This will be the most positive entry I’ve written on here. Bobby and I go way back to 2013 when he helped me understand my friend’s suicide. Over the years, check ins have guided me in relations...
Unexpected
So R told me that he was set up with a hotel by his friend. Is it possible that it was by choice just in case…? Dunno. T reached out and confirmed tonight. I’m not afraid or anything because I c...
