Entries 132

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Okay, volunteer work wasn’t too bad, but I still got stuff to do. Keep on with it, I guess. 11:43 AM right now. Until 2 PM, I want 2 hours 5 minutes of working. 23 minutes short. Shame on me! Go...

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Okay, I NEED to grind more. No more moping about, being distracted and all. 10:31 PM right now. Until 12 AM I want 1 hour 20 minutes of studying. 21 minutes short. Shame on me! Alright. I need t...

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Alright, what must I do now? Feeling dejected. Bored. Stagnant. Just plain bored. Despondent. Dispirited. How did I live 30 years and absolutely nothing with my life? I’m not stupid or lazy. At...

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Gosh it’s freaking amusing. It’s like the perfect, absolutely perfect description of how I am in law school, turned 180 degree. I am valued by the people around me. STRONGLY DISAGREE. Law school...

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I have three things I need to get done at work, ideally this week, but in order of priority: -Study COAT guides -Kevin B’s PC memo -Kevin L’s hearing Deep breath. I also have a crap ton of things...

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I’m having this thing where I’m trying to finish my last semester of law school as quietly as possible. Talking to no one. Networking is huge in this profession? Too bad. I HAVE to cut myself som...

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Okay, husband is out with his Habitat for Humanity volunteer thing. I’m here. Gotta make the most of it. Task 1: Finish Corporate Finance reading. I want to make it a point to finish my readings...

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A baby. That’s a HUGE milestone. No one is fully “ready.” Everyone is just figuring it out as they go. Should I like, just focus on one task and take hours doing it? Maybe I should? Maybe it’s t...

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7:31 AM. Until 7:55 AM realistically, I want 21 minutes of studying. Made it. I was talking about how I would keep it all to myself and wouldn’t talk to my husband… last night, I spilled it all t...

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Our goals and preferences just don’t align. Either that, or he’s the rational one and I’m the irrational, delusional one. That makes me think how lonely people who have schizophrenia or delusion...

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I should just try to remind myself now and then that… crying does NOT help. It does not help me progress in anyway toward what I want. It’s truly just a waste of time. I cry a lot. I sob. I love ...

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I’m so tired of everything. I’m so tired of trying. Things are just too hard. I’m faced with so much disappointment. I need to be extra, extra nice to my husband. He’s the only person who’s comp...

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Got a debt collection letter from $2,172. I totally thought I sorted this out 2 years ago. Driver hit me. I got taken into the emergency room. Insurance company was supposed to pay my bill. I wen...

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I need to get back on track and work hard. It’s been enough vacation time already. Can I give up Prosebox, Quora, and YouTube so I can do more math? My goals are aspirational but I frequently fa...

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A cute PB entry about a new baby. https://www.prosebox.net/entry/1538564/ I guess… I hope… it’s gonna be me by the end of this year, or a little while later. I still can’t believe it. I don’t kno...

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I’m just so sad. I can’t get over this depression. Thoughts about my doomed future. How tired I am. How I’m about to face so many new responsibilities. Trying to empty out all my resources to hel...

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I know seeing my grades will give me a heart attack again. I absolutely detest how law school keeps you in complete darkness about your grades. I can’t live another semester like this. It’s too s...

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Expecting this year: becoming a mom, getting my law degree, turning 30, taking the bar exam (96% chance of passing), getting the first full-time job ever in my life. None of these are that excit...

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3 years ago you snooped on my computer, found my Prosebox, and proceed to stalk it. I have already forgiven you. But I’m afraid you’ll do the same when you visit this Christmas. So that’s why th...

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Whatever, you know? If I do bad in law school and can’t get “cool” jobs, it’ll give me more motivation to do the science stuff. I’m trying to do this exercise where I say sentences in this format...

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It’s making me so sick. I just want out. Why? WHY do I have to kill myself for something I don’t even like? Can I just dissociate myself from my grades? As in, screw everything, whatever? I hate...

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Looking ahead at an all-nighter. Fuck law school. I’ve never hated anything more. I’ve never been more miserable. I’ve given up so much. I’ve worked so hard. With the absolute certainty that all ...

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Okay. I really can’t focus these days. Hubby is working from home (snow day) and that means I can’t work that well. I never do around him, for some reason. I’m so screwed. I’m so desperate. What ...

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Alright, no more watching the Tarzan clips on Youtube. I just can’t WAIT to watch that movie again. My favorite Disney movie pick is between Tarzan and The Lion King. LOVE LOVE LOVE THOSE TWO but...

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I’m not doing a good job with anything here. Not anything. Okay. 1:10 AM. I want to work for 1 hour then go to bed. I took like 45 minutes to have lunch today. Why? Okay. Time to work on stuff. 1...

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