2017. got it.
by nothispenelope
Entries 508
Page 14 of 21
all in an effort to decrease my depression. TA [the accident]
so. i currently live w/ a woman who. well she has to document ‘everything’. but. she only documents the things she knows. so. i got out most days bc: a: in an effort to decrease my depression [th...
so that headache i had. and um.
this is. actually from yesterday: there was something else but i don’t exactly remember what right now. uh anyway. so that headache i had the other day. [i guess that would’ve been yesterday.]. ...
um. yesterday today. someone in my head but it isn't me. *Con.*
so yesterday was. well i was more explosive then usual. i get irritated pretty easily but usually i can control it. yeah so i was sitting in the........mall and this woman was having a conversati...
for those who don't understand.
for those who don’t understand what i’m going through: basically. it’s like you’re hungover all. the damn time.
earn the fukin right. and hearing.
this is from earlier: So I’ve been watching ‘big bang’ and that sounds different too.like muffled. and i think i know why things sound different. I had most of my hearing in my um. right ear even...
so. i made art again. and.
if anyone’s going to be dismissive about my current situation or ignorant then........ok. i’ll stop. this is from.......um. yesterday actually: so. i made art again. i um produced it. and i’m em...
so take the pressure off./depression.
So. one of the reasons i um. went out today is to help my depression. er i mean. had i stayed in my depression would’ve been.well worse. > and by ‘today’ i mean um.......yesterday. ok so while...
what would it sound like? *Con.*
so. it’s really difficult to describe and explain sounds. which is why i’m not going to. but. this is more um...... if my brain/body could sing how/what they’ve been feeling. type thing. alrite ...
from the 14th - the 20th
so on the 14th which was sun. i um. well i slept. on mon.........oh yeah that was the day........valerie didn’t come and i got the concussion. so tues. i went out. i think. and wed. i was driven...
it's. been a day. and music sounds different. *Con.*
it’s. been a day it really has. it’s. been a hell of a day. So earlier. I listened to music cause i read something about music helping w/ um. ‘accidents’ like the one I had. So I listened to........
worse. and ex. *Con.*
So my period’s worse then it’s been in awhile. er well the nauseau is rather. and that’s probably in um...........conjunction w/ the after effects of ‘the accident’. so. wow. My ex. well 1 i hav...
um. today. and bleeding. TMI. *Con./NI*
So today. when i woke up i...........i didn’t feel good. I thought ‘you need heat’. I went to the bathroom. and.........’omygod i’m bleeding’. at first I didn’t recognise why. but then i’m like ‘...
concussion. and. oh wow.
so this is from...........earlier.........today. [10:30 p.m. atm]: i’m ready to type it now. concussion. ok so earlier. i well i was in pain and nauseaus. in my upper right back. [and yes that’s ...
loss and um. NIs.
i’ve been reading up on loss and um. NIs. and i was thinking what have i lost? my...........some of.........my ability to physically do things sans consciously thinking about them. 2. my ability ...
well. it's been a wk.
well. it’s been a wk. since my cncusion.
really? cause i sure don't feel lucky. *NI*
this is from another um......................blog. from earlier [5 a.m. atm.].: really? cause i sure don’t feel lucky. I’ve read that. one of the things to never say to someone w/ an NI is ‘you’r...
well. i feel like a fraud. *NI/the fall*
well. i feel like a fraud. like i shouldn’t be talking about this. like others have it ‘so much worse’ when it comes to.falls. like the guy in um.........’lords of dogtown’. [that was a sad movie...
talk about it. depression and well. NIs. SU.
So. oh wow. I went downstairs earlier and made pasta. [and by ‘made’ i mean microwaved it.]. and that was. ok i didn’t have too many physical problems w/ doing things. it was after. Now like a lo...
how i'm doing/so today i.
i did art today. er i mean. rather......i......produced it. .......um......created* it. [words are so hard right now.]. in order to translate how i’ve been feeling physically and emotionally. the...
i. i know how i feel. this is my reality right now. *long*
Ok so. last Mon. during the fall i got a cncsion..........yeah. [oh that word has um stars in it as i’m not quite ready to type out the whole word yet.]. So I recently joined a forum dedicated t...
about the fall on Mon. how i’m doing. long entry by the way. medical talk, symptoms, emotions. well. my bruises have gotten better. [it’s weird that i call them that ‘my’, bruises as though they ...
um. egg.
about ‘the fall’. i’m not um. great. If I explain things in odd ways for awhile on here [moreso then usual] it’s cause. that’s just easier for me right now. like the other day i couldn’t remember...
how i'm doing. [fall on Mon.].
i’m. actually i’ve been researching online my symptoms [bruise, frustration, dizziness. i won’t go on] and. falls. and i’ve started to understand things a bit more. everything i’m going through i...
um. wow. so relieved i could cry. i got very, very lucky.
so for those who don’t know I fell on Mon. on my back.........yeah. The good news is. it’s minor. [thank god.]. I got very, very lucky. i’m humbled and relieved and tired and scared. everything w...
yesterday. [again.].
um so yesterday was actually quite boring. although after the day before, Mon., a little less excitement was neccessary. i took the right.damn bus to the other store the one w/ metal detectors. ...