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I am not cut out for a desk job. Particularly one that requires me to be on a computer all day. I can barely handle the few hours I spend studying for my physics class at my computer. I bit off m...

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I managed to win and get my head in the right space that I wanted. I spent the whole evening deep-diving the material that we have learned from my physics class. I accept that I am slow. I need t...

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I am in the bargaining stage of grief. When my mind shifts from one paradigm to another it grieves the old belief structures. I have to go through all of the stages of grief. Metacognition is not...

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I gave myself a one day breather from the academic pressure. I kept it domestic and optimized the kitchen and made some meal prep staples. My mood was pretty decent until just a few moments ago. ...

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I left my physics class today feeling defeated again. I spent 5 hours today studying the material that I missed. I started the class feeling confident because he started teaching something I acc...

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I feel a little better about my physics class now that I remember about Khan academy. It’s a great resource. I stumbled upon it on accident while looking for a simple definition and it brought me...

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Yesterday, I had a pretty decent day at work. I don’t usually have bad days but yesterday was fun. I was paired with Adam, he and I have the biggest personalities on the team and we were matching...

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I knew today that I was going to struggle in my physics class. I didn’t struggle too hard but I was very intimidated. I missed the last class which was our second class where we started the unit....

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‘Tis the season for seasonal depression. It isn’t soul-crushing but it makes it hard to be motivated. Last night, I had a movie night with my niece and nephew. Then my sister and I watched Wild ...

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Why does my subconscious torture me? I had one of the worst dreams of my life. I love waking up disturbed and haunted, not! I dreamt that I was coming to terms with the loss of both of my sisters...

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I did not sleep well again last night. I have not had a good night’s sleep in weeks. Not since I quit coffee but I don’t think that this is because of me quitting caffeine. My body is expressing ...

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I had my first physics class yesterday and don’t have a good feeling about it. My first impression of my teacher is not so good. He doesn’t seem to be very structured. Perhaps I was spoiled by my...

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I’ve had a lot of rest the last two days. I feel like I have been in procrastination mode without anything to be procrastinating from. What am I avoiding? I committed to doing nothing for a chang...

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I finally got around to going over my budget and finances. In November Toni, my roommate, arbitrarily decided that she will take on rent in full and I will cover the cost of everything else. I on...

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I’m not too keen on polarizing with strangers on the internet when it comes to my philosophies. It doesn’t go anywhere because we’re all just serving our egos. It’s easy to commit to our own narc...

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I’m a little amused that I created a bit of a frantic morning for my roommate. On top of all the ways she is dependent on me, she uses me as her alarm clock. She can’t figure out how to use her p...

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I almost chose violence with my roommate. Ok, not actually. It took a conscious effort to not pick her up off the counter and put her in a playpen. I was making curries for dinner, it was less t...

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I somehow missed the nice words of encouragement from my teacher on Teams. She said I should be proud of myself. She appreciated my dedication to studying and my amazing summary cards and how I w...

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I can be a little out of touch at times. After I wrote my bitter entry the other day I remembered how heavy my depression can be. Rare as it is, it is suffering. Then I have a humbling epiphany a...

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Anger is not an easy one to process for me. I held it in all day yesterday. I can feel it bubbling up to the surface again today. There was no real trigger. I am angry with myself and I am very c...

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I can finally lay around and eat breads and desserts and get all fat and sassy without feeling like I should be studying because my class is over. Then on the sixth, I start physics. I am already...

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I’m over 24hrs on my fast. I suspect that I am in ketosis because my appetite is gone. I will see how long I can keep this up today. If I can last until tomorrow that would be great. I do have my...

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My patience is as thin as I am since I quit coffee. I couldn’t stomach witnessing Linda stand around, distracting others instead of working. I called her out and she told me that I’m not the boss...

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What we don’t like about others is what we don’t like about ourselves. I am conscious of this fact but I still struggle to recognize when I am doing it. Today, I am rumbling with my procrastinati...

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I don’t like to let my social anxiety win. The bonfire last night was a swell time. Adam invited a bunch of us from work. I finally got to meet Adam’s fiance. Varion showed up as well. He used to...

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